Dress Up
by HerNamewasAlice
Summary: Modern Au where Rey and Kylo are models. Rey's only been doing this a for a few months while he's being doing this for years. They never met each other but when they finally do meet, it's in an intimate shoot.
1. Nude Heels and Diamond Earrings

Rey gets nervous before any shoot. She shouldn't feel this way but she does. Each shoot she was assigned to was different, with photographers of all sort of personalities. Some photographers are kind while most were shrewd or eccentric.

This was different though.

She was going to be modeling with a well known model.

Rey had modeled with people before but never with a well known model, a successful one for that matter. She modeled with girls her age and sometimes with a boy but never with a professional. She's only been modeling for a few months and by accident. She was applying for a summer job before college at the mall and was stopped by a recruiter.

If Rey went to the left side of the mall instead of the right, none of this would have happened.

She expected modeling to be temporary and school to be permanent. But as of now, she's modeling in order to afford college tuition.

She's still amazed how she even got picked to model. She wasn't gorgeous, she was average. She was shorter than the average model, with freckles all over her cheeks and nose and had a wide forehead and ears that stuck out too. She's never worn makeup either until she was hired. She was grateful that there were makeup artists to do her makeup because if she did it on her own it would just smear all over.

Her manager always assures her that Rey was what they were looking for, someone who was natural. However she found it ironic since they paint her with a lot makeup. She doesn't complain though. It was a job that paid well. She sat there in the chair quietly as the makeup artists put bronzer and blush on her while the hairstylist curled her hair.

It's still strange to be groomed like a doll though.

* * *

The second the makeup artists and stylists were done, she examined herself. They had made her eyebrows thick with a strong arch, painted her lips red, covered any trace of her freckles, and contoured her face down to the cheekbones. They put a neutral brown eye shadow on her and lined her eyes with eyeliner that was winged at the end. She was wearing a short strapless lace mustard colored body con dress with a sweetheart neckline and a neutral fitted brown blazer over. She was also wearing nude high heels and dangling diamond earrings.

On the hanger, the outfit looked hideous but surprisingly, it looked nice. She was amazed how the stylists worked.

A small smile crept on her face. If Finn could see her now. He would say, see that's how you're supposed to wear makeup. Finn was the only model that she worked with that she became close to. He was three years older than her and was handsome and kind. She was infatuated with him for a while until she found out he was gay and was in a committed relationship with some pilot. Rey wasn't heartbroken over it though, she got a good friendship instead.

Finn was more fashionable than her and always lectured her to dress up outside of work.

Rey would if the clothes were comfortable.

She blinked in the mirror. She could barely recognize herself. She looked completely different. Older even.

Rey stood up and walked around the set to pass the time. The photographer was running late due to his flight being delayed (it was normal, nothing out of the ordinary). She sighed. She really wished she hadn't forgotten her phone at home. She could have been watching some videos to pass the time right now. When photographers or fashion directors and editors are running late, it can be up to a couple hours. Rey watched the set designers do the finishing touches to the set. The set was simple this time, a light pastel pink wall, a white floor, and a turquoise stool. There's white rose petals scattered on the floor to give it some texture.

It amazes her on how long the set designers took for a such a simple background and set. Other set designers that she encountered are detail oriented with elaborate designs but today it was minimal. She watched them run around, testing out the placements for the lighting.

"He's not here yet?" a rough voice asked.

Rey turned around - there's a man standing right beside her. He was tall and lanky with elongated features. His hair was long and dark but his eyes were darker. He had a beard and a goatee was dressed in a silk black suit. He was older than her, ten years or so.

"No," she answered clearly. He's taller than she imagined. More relaxed. Looking up close, she can see why he was a well known model. He had unique features that one paper sounded odd but somehow when put together, fit. He had a long nose, large ears, sharp features, and a flattened face but somehow he looked handsome. She wanted to friendly but something about the way he carried herself made her feel small. Intimidated.

He had a calm expression on his face and his hands in his pockets. He looked bored. Detached. "What's your name?" he asks then indifferently. There's a negative aura to him, a depressing one.

"R-ey," she stammered. Her cheeks turned pink beyond her control.

He nodded, not bothering to give her eye contact. "I'm Kylo," he said politely, without an expression on his face.

"Can you guys stand in over there?" a designer pointed to the set. "They're testing the lighting right now and they need a reference."

They both nodded and did what they were told.

She wonders how on earth she'll be able to smile for the pictures when he's around. Just standing next to him made her feel depressed as hell. In the shoot they're suppose to act like a couple - she doesn't know if she can be able to pull it off. She was still new, still getting used to portraying different moods and characters. The other models she worked with were either encouraging or outgoing but he wasn't. He was closed off. Distant.

Rey could tell that much just by the way he stood and stared.

The photographer finally arrives and arrives in a low key entrance. He looks tired and annoyed (most likely from the flight). "Okay everyone get together," he instructed as he checked the time on his watch. "I already wasted so much of your time already, let's try to finish this quickly." He pointed at Rey. "You, sit on the chair - sit sideways. Cross your legs. Relax your arms, look directly at the camera. Remain calm," he clapped his hands, urging for her to act quickly. "Sit up- sit up," he gestured for her to not slouch. "Lift your chin up - not that much -there. Good. Now sit still. Someone move a section of her hair to the front."The photographer waited until the hairstylists were done before giving out any other instructions. The photographer then turned to Kylo. "Kylo stand next her - a little bit more to right. Good. Look at her. And put your hand on her shoulder."

Kylo does so, gently placing his hand on her.

Her skin tightened as shock traveled across her body. It wasn't like anything she felt before - it felt like a spark. She ignored it and kept a straight face and focused on the camera. She absorbs herself into the shoot, listening intently to the photographer's directions while trying to look natural instead of stiff. Kylo pressed his fingers into her shoulder even more. Her body involuntarily trembled and he sensed it. She broke out from her focus and glanced at him. He looked back, his eyes boring into her. There was a slight smirk on the corner of his lips. Was he smirking at her?

"Now Rey look away from him," the photographer said, pulling her back into the shoot. "Good, keep that pose" - he takes several shots. "Now Kylo go to the other side and lean in towards her."

Rey's heart skipped a beat but she remained relax. She watched Kylo walk towards her. He bent down smoothly, attempting to be at her eye level.

"Rey look up," the photographer said in a low tone. "Kylo look at her."

She does, her eyes caught Kylo's dark eyes. He's tall that even bent down she had to look up at him. She falls small. His eyes were darkening, burning into her skin. His eyes flickered up and down - up to her eyes and down to her mouth. He's quiet and so was she but internally she was screaming. She felt exposed in front of him. Naked. She watch his lips twitch as he stared at her painted red lips. He wants to lick his mouth at the sight of her lips but he can't.

He leaned in closer, leaving only two inches from her mouth. She was trembling but she kept her pose. Mentally she counted, waiting for the next direction. But the photographer wasn't saying instead was absorbed with capturing the moment. It felt like forever, as if everything was paused except for them.

Fifteen. Sixteen. Seventeen.

The photographer didn't say anything.

Eighteen. Nineteen -

Kylo was getting closer to her - she can feel his breath on her lips. He cupped her face then, tilting her chin up. She wanted to turn away. This wasn't an order - "Great, hold it," the photographer said with enthusiasm.

She listens to the photographer, sat still as Kylo grazed her cheek with his fingertips. Her cheeks were heating up - she knows this because his fingers are feeling cooler to her. She watches him lean in more towards her more - he's almost to her mouth. He's going to kiss her, she sensed it. She feels it between his fingertips, between the tension -

"Great," the photographer's voice pulls him away from doing so. "Take a break you two."

* * *

Kylo breaks apart with ease. As if nothing had happened. She should do that as well but it was running through her mind over and over. It was strange for a model to take over - to do what he wanted and for everyone to be with okay with it. She couldn't help but wonder if Kylo was doing it for the moment or if he really wanted to kiss her. She shook off her thoughts and walked away from the set.

Rey watched the set designers move around the background as the makeup artists touched up her maeup. She watched in awe seeing set designers removing the chair and turning off the lights along with replacing the white rose petals with new ones. They were installing forty hanging white Christmas lights at the moment. The background was looking prettier - softer. They did the installations and touch up so fast and smoothly.

She remained still in a chair as the makeup artists took off her blazer and applied shimmer to her shoulders and jawline. She closed her eyes for them as they removed her eye shadow and applied one that complimented the light.

"Ilene, apply some more concealer, " one of the makeup artist said. "I can see some of freckles."

Ilene nodded and caked Rey's face with even more make up. "Alright Susie. I'm also going to touch up on her mascara, she has some smudge marks."

"Do you guys enjoy putting on makeup yourselves?" Rey asks, her eyes still shut. She was attempting to make conversation.

"Of course we love it."

"That's good I hate it," Rey laughed. "I wouldn't hate it as as much if I was good with makeup as you guys."

"Aw thank you well you don't need it anyways you're already pretty," Ilene said.

Rey laughed. "No. I doubt that." She didn't believe it since they were doing her makeup. "I hate my freckles. How did you do that? Cover freckles I mean. It's like magic."

Ilene laughed. "A lot of foundation and concealer and practice."

"Darn. I hate the practice part," she laughed.

"You're so lucky to model with him," Susie whispered to Rey.

She shrugged. "He's just like anyone else." She was surprised that they act this way - they should be use to being around models.

"He's so gorgeous," Ilene added, her cheeks turning pink.

Rey couldn't help but to blush.

* * *

They get back to taking pictures. They are instructed to lean against the wall, several feet from each other. This part was fine. No physical contact.

"Rey you're tense. Try to relax. Be coy," the photographer said in between taking the shots. "Look at Kylo."

She bit her lip and turned to Kylo. Kylo was leaned against the wall with his jacket hung over one shoulder. He smirked at her and laughed softly to himself. She glared at him. It was easier for him. His face was meant to mope.

She exhaled and nodded. Be flirtatious, she thought to herself. Try to look alluring.

"Stand higher, lift up your chin," the photographer said. "Bring one leg forward."

Her dress rises up a bit as she moved her leg, just a little bit but its enough for Kylo to notice. He eyes her from corner of his eye but she isn't aware. He was careful when he stole glimpses of her. Always in between shots.

"Both of you come closer," the photographer said once Kylo's jacket was discarded. "Kylo wrap your arms around her."

He holds her from behind, his hands holding her firmly. His hands grazes against her skin. Her skin is soft - he wanted to bite her exposed shoulder. He leaves no space in between them. The only thing that was in the way were their clothes.

"Rey don't be nervous," the photographer said, unable to hide his annoyance with working with new models.

A hairstylist comes in briefly to fix both of their hair.

"You should be used to this," Kylo whispers to her.

She ignores him.

"How long have you've been modeling?" he asks in a kinder voice.

"A few months," she answers him then.

He shifted slightly. "How old are you?"

"Eighteen."

"Do you like it?" he cleared his throat. He sounded surprised.

"Yes and no. It's still uncomfortable." She doesn't ask for his age. She already knew.

"You'll get used to it."

The hairstylist walked away after fixing the last strand of hair. They returned back to the position and once the photographer was satisfied, he announced the next pose. "Kylo sit on the floor. Rey lay your head on his lap."

* * *

It was so strange to rest her head on a man's lap. She did it for two shoots but this was different. He was an older man and was a professional. There was a different mood than the ones she did before. The ones she did was playful while this was serious, quiet, and intimate.

They waited for the photographer to find the right spot and angle to capture the picture. She tried to look away but she was transfixed by the way Kylo looked at her - he looked at her with no emotion and intensity at the same time. What was he thinking? How was he able to that? How can he hide his thoughts so well? Rey was an open book. His hand was in her hair while the other was resting on her thigh, close to the hem of her short dress.

She reminds herself that he has to put his hands there and that was that.

"Just take a deep breath and relax," Kylo said. He ran his fingers through her hair.

She hears the shutter sound of the camera.

"Rey move closer," the photographer snapped.

She moves closer to Kylo's lap - he shifted slightly and so did she. She was too close to his crotch. She moved back slightly. She caught him, him stealing a glimpse of her chest. She didn't notice that her breasts was swelling up until now. Her breasts were almost popping out in this position - she can see his Adam's apple throbbing.

Regardless she remained professional and so did he.

She focuses on his hair and the way it was falling. He had such nice hair. It was tousled. Wild. Silky. He had nicer hair than she did.

"One more pose and then we're done. Let's do a shot of just you Rey," the photographer announced. "Rey move a bit forward - a little bit more - there and lay down." Kylo moves away from the set and watches the set designers rearrange the rose petals on the floor. The photographer waited until the hairstylists finished fixing her hair and smoothing out the end of her dress. He takes several shots. "Rey tilt your head more, look at the camera. Great. Now look up - like you're lost. Focus on the lights. The blur. Think of stars. There. Perfect." He gestures for Kylo to come in to the scene. "Kylo go on top of her. Rey keep your eyes on him - spread your legs a bit -there that's enough."

Her heart was racing. She was still - she had to be still. She wants to look away but she can't.

"Rey pretend you're afraid."

She's already afraid.

She hears shutter sounds, meaning soon was the next instruction.

"Now Kylo pin down her wrists - Rey don't tense up. Kylo look at her as if you want her - look at her with jealously. Let her know that no one else can have her. You're angry - you want her," Kylo nodded and deepened his gaze, gritting his teeth and his grip on her.

It amazes her how it was second nature for him to convey any emotion within milliseconds. If this wasn't staged, she would have believed it. She can almost feel his blood boiling, almost. His hair is spilling down, framing his face well.

"Rey don't open your eyes that wide - don't look startled. Look soft. Look as if you want him. Act like you're submissive but you don't know what's going on. Look innocent- that's wonderful. Dead on."

She softens her gaze even when Kylo is lowering himself towards her a bit- wait the photographer didn't say anything about that. His mouth was twitching slightly. His grip is getting tighter that it hurts.

She hears the photographer taking pictures. "That's a wrap- wait I have an idea. One more pose and then we're done. Lean in and kiss her. Tilt your head to the left so we can see you."

He leans in without any refusal. He kisses her and she closed her eyes then.

"Rey open your mouth for him. There- hold that pose."

His tongue is in her mouth, it's making her whole body heat up. But he just keeps his tongue there and nothing else, it's staged.

She mentally counts until they get to break away.

One. Two. Three. Four. Five.

"Kylo move her hands over her head and deepen the kiss. Rey kiss him back."

He's leaning even more - heat was developing in between her legs but she remained still. It scares how he's not even kissing her and it's making her aroused. He's fidgeting slightly but no one else noticed but her. She could feel him, they were skin to skin. She could feel that he was getting hard. Rey wondered what was going on in his mind.

Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.

"Perfect. That's a wrap."

* * *

Rey immediately changed her clothes when the shoot was over. She rushed to the bathroom in the studio and got dressed in her denim shorts, a beige T-shirt, and an over size faded navy blue hoodie. She was careful to get out of the dress without ruining it.

It wasn't hers to keep.

Some shoots, she's allowed to keep some clothes but not this one. This dress alone was worth four hundred dollars and that's just the dress. She didn't want to know how much the blazer and shoes were.

Once she put on her sneakers she heads off to the wardrobe department to drop off the clothes.

"Don't forget the earrings," Kylo said as he wiped his face with his hand. He was carrying the suit over his shoulder.

"Thank you I almost forgot," she took off the earrings then. He looks way different. He's in black jeans, a white T shirt, and a black leather jacket. He had just removed the foundation on his skin she could tell by how dark his skin is now. She can see sun spots and moles and how oily his skin was. It pleased her, to see him in casual attire. He looks more approachable. Human. She turns away from him and hands in the items back to the head of the department.

She grabbed her backpack then and swung it on her shoulders and headed out.

He's going in her same direction but she isn't bothered. She knows that they're heading out in the same direction.

She forgets what had happened in the shoot in an instant. She's eager on going home.

"Where's your car?" he asks her before she walked out of the parking lot.

She turned around. They're several feet apart and he's about to get into his car. "I don't have a car," she said awkwardly. She didn't expect him to speak to her after the shoot. She expected for them to part ways like most models she worked with.

"Are you getting picked up?" he asks. He unlocked his car - he had a nice car.

"No I'm going to take the bus," she answered simply.

"How far do you live?"

"Twenty miles."

"Wow that's far. I only live ten miles from here. I can give you a ride if you want," he offered.

She bit her lip. It was such a tempting offer. It was a two hour bus ride home but she barely knew him. She didn't even have her phone on her if anything happened. "That's very kind of you but no thanks. I don't want you to waste your time -

"I don't mind."

It startled to sprinkle and it became rain. Hard rain. She frowned. This was going to slow down the buses. She never understood California weather at all. One second it's hot and sunny then get's fucking cloudy and rainy.

"You sure?" she asks.

He raises his hands in the air tauntingly and flashed her a smirk. "If anything happens to you, I'm pretty sure your manager would hunt me down."

Rey laughed. "Yeah. She will." Her manager was supposed to be here today but had a meeting for her other client.

He opens the car door for her. "Hop in."

* * *

It's raining harder and she's thankful that she's inside his car that has the heater on.

"How did you feel about the shoot today?" he asks.

"Very awkward," she laughs. "The photographer was very detailed. I didn't even catch his name - it was so weird he was so detailed and in a rush."

He laughs. "That's Hux for you."

"A what?"

"Hux. That's his name."

"Such an odd name - you know him?"

"I work with him from time to time. This is the first time I modeled for him though."

"How about you? How did you feel about it?"

"Annoyed. He's over compulsive. He's a fucking ass Nazi."

"But he was nice. He's very passionate with his work."

Kylo opened his mouth but noticed how stretched out the traffic was. "It's going to be a long ride - would you want to grab something to eat first?"

"Yes," she says without a second /

* * *

She doesn't know how they ended up like this - them making out in the bathroom of a diner. She doesn't know how this happened - he has her propped up on the sink with a hand on her waist. His lips were at her throat while her fingers were in his hair.

They should stop. They shouldn't be doing this.

He bit the milkiness of her throat as his hand began to rub her clit. She shuddered but managed to suppress her moan. "Moan for me," he growled to her throat. He kissed her collarbone, pressing his erection to her.

The only thing that was between them were their clothes.

"I can't someone will hear - we shouldn't be doing this here."

She pulled him by the hair and kissed him on his mouth, muffling their groans.

He kissed back without a second thought, his hand rubbing her crotch. "Your so wet," he said in between deep kisses. "I can feel how wet you are. Can I?" he asks in a low moan, his fingers creeping to the zipper of her shorts.

Rey shook her head. "We shouldn't be doing this here," she leaned and kissed his neck, attempting to calm him down. His hands were all over her and he was kissing her roughly.

He restrains himself then and pulls away from her mouth, his hand going underneath her shirt. "You have two options. We can go to your home or mine. What would it be?" there's lust in his voice. Madness.

"How far is your home from here?"

"Eight miles."

"Let's go there then."

He smiled in excitement. "Alright," he said, stealing another kiss.

* * *

He could taste her inexperience. It's on the corner of her lips. His hands are on both sides of her face, pulling her closer to him as he kissed her, urging her to part her lips for him. She's reluctant, urging for him to go slow but he's impatient, hungry. He pushes her to the wall and began to grind himself against her as he kissed her.

She parts her mouth then out of shock. He's hard down there and her body was warming up to him. She was getting wet and trembling and moaning all at once.

He takes her by the mouth and puts his tongue inside her. He's not afraid to be rough. Her lipstick was smearing all over their skin. He's not afraid to kiss her hard. He wants her now.

He tugged the rim of her lip as he murmured to her. "I was going to go crazy if I couldn't see you."

"Really?"

He nodded, sucking on her bottom lip. He's chewing on it almost, softening her lip for his pleasure. "I had to restrain myself during the shoot. I wanted to touch you so bad - it was maddening. There you were. You were on me with your breasts popping out in that short little dress. I wanted to grope you and slip my fingers underneath your dress and finger you until your legs gave out."

It startles her how he explained in such detail. He explained in such a violent tone. "I didn't know you thought that way." She shrugs him off of her, before he could even reach to her breasts. She doesn't like the idea of being controlled.

"In what way?"

"You seem so indifferent. Relaxed."

"Well I can't act like myself in the shoot. That would be inappropriate." He reaches for her hair then. He reaches for anything she would allow him to touch. He runs his fingers in her hair gently, attempting to regain her consent. He grabbed her and carried her off to his bedroom. He holds her carefully, gingerly pressing kisses on her collarbone.

"How did you feel when you had to be on top of me? When you had to kiss me?" she asks, unable to fight her curiosity.

"You felt me," he said simply. "You felt how much I wanted you didn't you?"

She nodded.

"I wanted to slip my dick into you," he said as he laid her on the bed. He climbed on top of her and softly kissed her cheek. "I wanted to fuck you there."

"There were people though," she reminded him.

He lets out an amused laugh. He doesn't really care. He's been in the spotlight for such a long time that he doesn't care what he does anymore. He doesn't give a damn about his image or reputation. "Especially then. I wanted to let everyone know that I wanted you and that I'm not afraid of claiming you."

Rey frowned. "I'm not something you can claim," she bit out every word. She isn't flattered at all. Those thoughts surface again, doubts. She shouldn't be in a place like this with a person like him.

He frowned. "I meant it as a compliment," he corrected. He sounded annoyed.

She sat up and adjusted her clothes. She frowned and her heart started to beat slowly. "I know - can we just not do this?"

His face fell. "You don't want to do this anymore?"

Rey shook her head. "I'm sorry but I changed my mind -

Kylo quickly got up. "It's alright."

"Are you sure?"

He painted a smile on his face and patted her head. "It's fine," he said as he detached himself from her.

"It's just everything's going so fast - I want to take things slow."

He petted her head. "It's fine. I'll take you home instead."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," he said quietly.

"Will you...will you call me after today?" she asked, holding her breath. His eyes were disconnected in her. He seemed uninterested. Disappointed.

"I will."

But he didn't.

* * *

He didn't call her.

That was the last time she saw him. She tried calling him a few times within the month but he never answered.

And that was that.

Two months had passed since she had encountered him. But it was alright because she accepted it. She went on with her life. She focused on modeling and improving.

"Rey," her manager, Carrie calls out for her one day.

"Yes?"

"Clear your schedule for next Friday. You have a shoot."

Rey went pale and nodded. She had a bad feeling about this. "Alright. Is there anyone else that's going to model with me?" she asked holding her breath. Please don't say his name, she thought.

"No," her manager shook her head. "It's just you. He'll send me further details about the shoot later tonight."

"Who's the photographer?"

"Oh you should know him. He's very well renowned."

"What's his name?"

"Ben Solo."


	2. Chapter 2

Proceed on to the next chapter


	3. Blue Jeans

**a/n: i edited chapter 1.**

* * *

He has this John Lennon vibe to him. Shaggy hair, thin metal framed round glasses, mustache and beard and all. Rey blinked in marvel of this figure, this icon. He's lanky and lean, dressed in a tan button up shirt, dusty green jacket, and sturdy blue jeans and beat up tan sneakers. She couldn't believe that she was standing face to face with him, with his hand out for her. "Hello, it's nice to meet you Rey."

Rey gives him a firm handshake. "It's nice to meet you -

"Ben. Call me Ben," he gave her a warm smile. His smile was both goofy and charming.

Rey couldn't help but to tilt her head a bit. This was Ben Solo - this was Ben Solo the former model turned renowned photographer. He looked so different in person compared to the photos of his model days. During his model years he looked exactly like Kylo, brooding and seductive but now he looks almost like a different person. With his facial hair it made his face look slimmer, younger. He looks normal. Approachable. He looks like almost every hipster she's encountered in her life but there's a goofy and friendly aura to him. He seems happy, at peace though and that's what pulls her in. A defining quality. "It's an honor to work with you sir," she began, clearing her throat. He's not the person she grew up seeing but it was still an amazing experience to know that he's just like anyone else. "I admire your work so much -

"It's nothing really," he assures, brushing it off as his cheeks turned red.

She couldn't help but smile. He's shy. Embarrassed. Rey found it strange that he was embarrassed but it was refreshing. "Are you kidding me?" she said in disbelief. Honestly who could blame her? He created many beautiful photos, all that are still iconic and talked about. "You're just being modest. You're photos are so beautiful!" Her favorite work by him was a photo of a boy with unruly bleach hair and sullen cheeks, smoking a cigarette to a gray tinted white wall. In the photo it's from the shoulders up and the boy was surrounded by smoke, and the photo was double exposed, in between was a layer of red.

"Don't credit me - I just take pictures of beautiful t-things."

The smile froze on her face as a thought occurred, if she was the beautiful thing he was taking a picture of. Within seconds, her face matched the swatch of red on his cheeks. She wanted to ask him if he thought she was beautiful but she doesn't. She knew it only create awkward tension. "I was wondering - why did you pick me to be your model?" she asked then. That was the question that had been on her mind for a week. "I'm not really well known and I have little experience."

Ben pushed his glasses up. "Those are my reasons why I wanted you. You're a fresh face. You're a new perspective."

Her nose crinkled a bit. He even sounded like a hipster. She crinkled her nose not out of disgust but fondness. Rey nodded then. "I see. Do you miss modeling?" she asked then. She remembers growing up to the photos of the twins. Those photos were stunning but controversial for the implied sexual content.

Ben immediately shook his head. "No. It was really nerve wracking," he said quietly, swallowing the lump in his throat. His mood changed and became distressed. "I was under the camera for as long as I could remember. It affected me deeply and it left a lot of scars." Ben had quit being a model at nineteen and disappeared from the public for a few years before resurfacing as a photographer.

Rey nodded. She immediately understood. He was raised under that life, was forced to be completely identical with his twin. She knew by heart that going through puberty under the cameras was a nightmare because during that time, photographers posed him and his brother into suggestive poses with one another. He and his brother were a duo in the photo shoots since day one. "I see. I see why you like being a photographer better. You get to make the decisions," she gave him an inviting smile.

"Yes, very much so. I like having a voice. Do you like modeling?"

She shrugged then. "It's okay - I don't really know. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't."

He raised his eyebrow. "Why is that?"

"Dealing with direction really. I'm still new and I can't really give what they want. And it's hard to appear natural with other models."

He nodded. "I've been there. Do the workers treat you well though? You haven't run into any issues?"

"Issues?"

"Yeah," his voice went low.

Her eyes widened. "No. Luckily none." He was implying if she was being sexually abused or sexually assaulted.

His shoulders relaxed then. "Good. How do you feel about the photographers?"

"Some are nice - but not always."

Ben chuckled. "Don't worry, I'm nice."

"So what is the shoot for? What company? What brand?"

Ben laughed. "It's just a personal shoot for me."

"Personal?"

"Yeah I'm doing a series for a gallery."

"What kind of series?" she asked. She couldn't help but to be intrigued. "What's the theme?"

His cheeks became red. "Beautiful souls."

* * *

They talked for the rest of the day. It was nice, different. It was common for photographers to meet the model and get to know them over lunch but this went passed that. It went to the end of the day. They talked, asking about one another about their interests, desires, and fondest memories.

"For the shoot tomorrow, what do you want me to wear?" she asks then.

They were in an old record shop with Janis Joplin in the background.

He was standing there, his eyes locked onto the selection of records. He goes through a box, lightly touching every one. "Anything really. It just has to be a nice blue."

"A nice blue?" she raised her eyebrow. It was so strange that he had no set outfit - no stylist or designer for that matter.

"A royal blue. That'll be nice," he smiled to himself. He was amused by how perplexed she was. She was amazed and shocked that he was giving her some sort of liberties for the shoot.

"How do you want my hair?"

"It's up to you," he said as hummed to Janis Joplin. He began to sing the words, his body swaying side to side as he went through the other boxes of records.

"How about makeup? Do you want me to wear makeup?"

"I just want you to be you," he said chuckling. He looked at her for a moment and she saw his dimples.

"The real me doesn't wear make up or cares about what she wears," she countered then. "She has dirt in her fingernails no matter how hard she tries to keep them clean and she has more freckles than you could do with them."

Ben laughed. He turned to her and tilted his head slightly to her level. "You're still beautiful."

* * *

The shoot is in a studio by the beach. She watches as he sets up the lights and set himself. Rey couldn't help but to be absorbed into the intensity in his eyes. He looks so focused, in the moment. His large hands are everywhere, coming to contact with everything. Every now and then he would fix his glasses and tuck his hair from his eyes - Rey was mesmerized.

She could feel his passion. She could feel his love for what he does. It amazes her how comfortable the shoot was, how it was only him conducting the shoot. He likes to work alone, she could tell. He likes doing everything, every single process but it still felt professional. He's setting up something simple yet dimensional. The lighting is so light that the shadows on the wall are pale gray. The wall paper is white with thin swipes of translucent watercolor gray scattered all about along with some gold glitter.

He's not as muscular as Kylo. He's lean but there's signs in his body that he was once built. He's sturdy though, sturdy arms and sturdy hands.

She sat there, patiently waiting. She was already dressed for the shoot: a bare face with a little bit of mascara, a medium length chiffon off the shoulder blue dress, and her hair was down.

"You ready?" he asks, pulling up his pants slightly.

She nodded. They had discussed what he wanted in the shoot the day before and she feels at ease. She remained seated as he approached her with a box. He pulled out a brush and some kind of black paint or ink. Rey held out her right hand for him and watched as he went on one knee and began to outline the lines on the palm of her hand. His eyes are locked onto the process, his teeth caught in a grit. Rey's heart skipped a beat. He's staring at her but he's not looking at her.

He's looking at her as a subject.

It's very humbling though - very different.

He moved away once he finished painting the last interior line and applied some gold glitter on her shoulders and cheekbones. He's delicate doing this, very gentle. Rey couldn't help but to shudder from his touch.

As he waited for the application to dry he went to change the music to David Bowie. Rey sat still, examining her painted hand. He outlined it to emulate a comic book hand. It was really cool to see her hand transform into something new by just a few lines.

He props her to sit in front of the wall and they begin.

The first shot, he takes a picture of her straight on, with her eyes shut and no expression on her face.

Unlike Kylo, Ben wasn't the best speaker. He spoke softly and stuttered from time to time but he was great at making you feel as if you're with an old friend. Rey liked that because she gets to know what he wants.

The next shot, she covers her eyes with her hand, exposing the drawn lines to the viewer.

With every shutter sound, she moved into a different pose, followed every direction until it became like a dance to her. A routine.

He takes a final shot of her staring at the view of the beach before ending the session. "Thank you, Rey," he said thankfully.

"We're done already?" she blinked. Where had the time gone?

Ben laughed but gave her a polite answer. "Yes. You were great."

She didn't feel like she did a good job but it was nice to hear. Within seconds her face flushed as a smile developed. "It was an honor to work for you," she said back. She meant it, every word. She became quiet then and wondered if she'll ever see him again.

She watch his mouth open but nothing came out.

She was hopeful still, on her toes, waiting for him to say something.

"I hope you make it home safely," he said then.

Her heart fell but she kept a smile. She thought about being the one to attempt to keep some ties with one another but the thought vanished when she remembered her experience with his brother. "Thank you. The same goes for you."

* * *

To Ben's disappointment, none of the pictures were good. He was going through the photos he had taken of Rey a few days ago but none spoke to him. He was editing them still however, trying to make the best of the shots he had gotten. Rey was a pretty girl but the shots of her were static.

Emotionless.

None of them seemed right.

During the shoot, he even tried to liven her mood but she wasn't responding to the way he wanted to.

Ben even waited a few days before going through the shots to give himself time to have a different perspective but he still felt the same.

Disappointed.

She was a nice girl but these weren't the photos he wanted.

Ben slumped to his desk and sighed. He had been experiencing the same problem for the past month. He had gone through a handful of girls for the shoot but none captured the message. The girls he had hired were either too seductive or too static. It's not her, it's the message he's trying to convey. His series was a series of the in between stage of beauty; in between innocence and sexuality.

Rey was too innocent. Even with the photos of her looking off and with sad expressions didn't translate into a dark subject matter.

The stills of her were beautiful but it didn't convey the message. The stills he had taken were just pictures of a pretty girl radiating under the light instead of being caught between two stages of sexuality. Ben desperately wanted to make her work with his art, but she didn't belong. She was too precious, too wholesome.

He sat up and decided to go to the bookstore that was just around the corner of his apartment. There was no use for him to let himself stress out. He had to keep himself busy from reminded that the deadline for the gallery was in two weeks.

When he gets to the bookstore, his hair and clothes are disheveled and his glasses had smudge marks. He doesn't care though, he never does. Instead he makes his way towards the magazines and skims through them in attempt to find another model. None of them caught his eye - all were airbrushed and unrealistic images. Glamorous yes but beautiful? No.

Beauty was open ended but for his idea of beauty, it was something tangible. Little flaws. Defining features.

He continued to flip through magazines until something caught his eye. It was a spread, a shoot with his brother and a girl. The photos were stunning. Dark. Sexy. All of the shoots his brother had an implied sexual content but this was done nicely and girl fit him nicely. The girl was gorgeous, in a little strapless dress and heels. The photo that caught Ben's interest was the one of her laying on his brother's lap. She was laying there in a submissive pose, she looks sweet and obedient. Her cheeks were flushed and breasts were flushed pink as well, on the verge from spilling out.

She would be perfect for his shoot. His eyes were about to skim the article until he noticed something. Her eyes even though were coated and lined with makeup, was warm. Rey. This was Rey.

Ben blinked. He barely recognized her.

He flipped to another page and stared at the shot for a long time. In the photo Kylo was on top of her and was pinning her hands over her head. Ben's eyes flickered in arousal at how alluring she looked. He really liked the image. Really liked it. She looks so afraid, so naive and submissive, unaware that she was a little sex kitten.

He liked the photos so much that he buys the ten dollar magazine. Once he purchased it he made his way back to his apartment and calls up Rey's manager to request another shoot.

This shoot will be different now that he knows what she's capable of.


	4. White Silk Dress

Chapter Three: Silk White Dress and a Black Lace Bralette

* * *

Rey's manager calls in the morning again. "Hey Rey I've got good news and bad news," her managers begins.

"Hi Carrie," Rey yawned. She rubbed her eyes and clutched on to her phone.

"Did I call you at a wrong time? I can call later -

"No - no are you kidding?" Rey said through another yawn. "I've been awake for hours." It was ten in the morning and she was still in her bed but her manager didn't have to know that. She put her phone on speaker and stretched out her body.

"Oh, good. Anyways it's not as bad but Ben Solo wants you to come back to redo the shoot."

Rey immediately sat up. She quickly turned off the speaker mode and held the phone to her ear. "Really? Did I do something wrong?" She was surprised. She sworn she did a good job and that Ben was pleased.

"Oh no! Heavens no child," Carrie assures. "This happens often. Sometimes photographers don't like the photos and want to retake them. It could be due to lighting or weather or just a change of direction. You know how artists are but at least he's paying double than what he paid you for."

Rey bit her lip but remained calm. It was so hard to please the people in the model industry but Rey was going to stay positive. "So when is the reshoot?"

"Next week, on a Tuesday. He's scrapping the whole shoot and doing a different location even."

"Really, where?"

"He says it'll be in a rented studio downtown. It's going to be completely different, he said. You're going to work with another model this time."

Her skin tightened then. She clutched on to her cellphone. _Please don't be Kylo_ , she thought. _Please don't be Kylo - what are the odds that it'll be him again?_ "Do you know who the model is?" Rey asked, keeping her composure.

"You worked with him before, his brother."

Rey let out a groan. She forgot that part. Fuck. Damn Finn wasn't kidding when he said everyone knows each other in the fashion industry.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing - it's just I don't feel comfortable working with Kylo," she couldn't help but to be flat out honest. He treated her horribly and she still couldn't believe she was attracted to him for that one day.

"Did he do anything to you?" her manager sounded worried.

"No - no" - well the only thing he did was not call her back. But Rey knew that wasn't a good excuse. She knew that she had to remain professional because she's not going to like everybody she works with. That was life. "He didn't."

"Okay," Carried said, her tone relaxing then. "Just remember, this is a great opportunity for you. Not a lot of new models get this. It'll open you to so many more offers and jobs. Just hold your breath and it'll be over before you know it."

Rey exhaled and nodded. "Alright, I'll do it - well what's the direction of the shoot? Did Ben Solo mention it to you?"

"He says he wants to capture sensuality between a new couple."

She bit her lip. That was completely different than what his series was originally intended to be "I don't have to be naked, right?" she asks then. Please say no. Please say no.

"No. You won't. You'll be fully covered. Remember, Rey it won't be real. Everything will be implied content."

Somehow she doubted that. With her last shoot with Kylo they ended up making out in a bathroom. "I know - I'm just making sure because you know some shoots models are naked and I'm not comfortable with that."

"Don't worry, people are going to be there. I'll be there."

People? Her shoot with Ben it was just them. And she liked that. She liked it being casual and now it was going into a complete different direction. But this was a great opportunity. She already felt lucky with modeling with Kylo Solo but now actually modeling for Ben Solo? Ben Solo rarely used humans in his shoot. Most of his things were of nature and objects. This was a chance in a lifetime. "Okay... I'll do it."

She had bad feeling about this.

* * *

Tuesday:

Ben and Kylo don't get along.

At all.

The Ben Solo she had met - the easy going and level natured was being frustrated and riled up by his brother.

Everyone was in silent bewilderment as they witnessed the twins fighting.

They weren't just squabbling, they were screaming at one another.

"Hey I didn't want to do your dumbass shoot!" Kylo yelled. "I had better things to do but you fucking begged me. So be grateful I'm doing you a favor!"

Rey stayed still. She was laying on Kylo's lap. She could feel the vibrations of the harshness of his tone. His anger. Annoyance. Bitterness. She wanted to move but she was frozen with fear. They were in the middle of shooting and then he and Ben started to argue. She tried to break away from the shooting but they both insisted to go on.

"You're so full of yourself! I don't know why you have to make a snide remark every time I give you instructions. I'm the photographer. I'm the one paying you to model for me," Ben spat out. "You freaking think you're too good for everything. But you're not. You're just like anyone else so start respecting everyone and change your damn attitude. Be thankful for the people that make it possible for you to make a living."

"Then why don't you use yourself as a model then if I'm not good enough?"

"I didn't say you weren't good enough. I just simply asked for you to shift to the right -

"It's the same shit. You're treating me as if I never done this before."

"You're being ridiculous. This isn't the first time a photographer told you to try a different pose so why are you so offended?"

Kylo was about to speak until he felt Rey sat up.

"Maybe we should take a break so you guys can... sort things out," Rey said slowly. Her tone was weak, sheepish. She didn't know how to respond in a situation like this. The whole time they were shooting, the brothers were fighting. It was hard to capture Ben's image when the two were constantly barking at one another.

The brothers became silent and so did the whole room.

The lighting and set up crew watched quietly, waiting intently for the brothers' next move.

Ben and Kylo exchanged looks to one another, without any emotion or expression. She couldn't help but to wonder if they were always like this when they used to model and work together. She wonders if they ever got along.

Her eyes transfix on the both of them and the way they looked at each other. They were communicating, she gathered. They were able to converse with each other without using any words. That fascinated her.

Ben's the one to break the stare. He shifts his body and faces his crew. "Let's take a break," he said smoothly, his tensed shoulders unraveled then.

One of the crew members bundles her up in a robe while another handed her some coffee. Rey takes both items without any question. She was tired and she was cold. She was wearing a thin silk white dress with a deep v neckline and triangle cut outs on her waist. It had thin straps and it was backless. Underneath she was wearing a black lace bralette with no padding. It wouldn't make much of a difference really. Her breasts were small.

She sat on one of the chairs as she enjoyed her coffee, right next to her manager Carrie. They watch the people shuffle and get some food but the only people that weren't relaxing were the Ben and Kylo.

They just stood there on opposite sides, drawing their full attention with items. For Ben it was his camera and Kylo it was his phone.

"Believe it or not, this is nothing," Carrie said nonchalantly. This was nothing new to her. She had been in the business for years. She took a big sip of her coffee before continuing. "There are more intense people in the industry, worse than them. Just two little boys throwing tantrums."

Rey nodded and watched with huge eyes at the sight. It still amazes her that she was working with them - the Solo Brothers. They used to be very close when they were both models - the famous brother duo. They were featured together in everything - magazines, videos, and runways. Their careers required them to dressing alike and constantly monitoring their likeness and keeping up an image - of course things have to change. Being that close was destined to cause some drift.

"Be careful you don't want to get that dress dirty," Kylo commented, not bothering to look up from his cellphone.

Rey ignored him and took another sip of her coffee. She doesn't want to fight. She doesn't even want to acknowledge their sort of/almost hookup. She pauses and wonders if Ben knew. A blush surfaced then.

Before she knew it, the break is over.

They go on with the shoot until Ben becomes anxious. He was shaking a bit, realizing that the crew was watching him work. "You know what this isn't working out," he said politely to the crew. He put his camera down and took off his glasses to rub his eyes. "It's not you guys - it's just I haven't worked with a crew in years - it's making me nervous." All of his photos were done completely by him, independently and away from a crowd. He liked working alone. Hell for the first years that he's been a photographer he photographed nature and inanimate objects before pushing himself out of his comfort zone to photograph people. The most he could do was work with just the model one on one. "Don't worry I'll pay every one of you, it's just I want to do this project alone."

Kylo went to his brother then without a second thought. "Are you okay?" he asks.

Ben put on his glasses then and blinked. "Yeah - I'm just experiencing a little anxiety."

Kylo frowned. He knows this too well. Ben was always nervous being in crowds ever since they were little kids being dragged to shoots. The older they became, the more the media became fascinated with them. They grew up under cameras. Their lives were exposed by thin sheets of printed paper. And because of that Ben suffered from anxiety attacks ever since he was fourteen. "Go sit down," he instructed his brother. "I'll let the crew out. Rey go get Ben some water and whatever food is out on the table."

Rey does so without any question.

Her manager Carrie makes Ben a plate while Rey got the water.

"Thank you - I'm sorry for wasting your time -

"It's alright. I still want to work with you," Rey assured him then.

"Really? It'll be the third time reworking the project."

"Well third time's the charm right?"

Ben chuckled softly.

"I'm really honored to be working with you."

"No - don't be. Especially with today. I haven't been exactly acting professional." His cheeks went red the second it hit him that everyone today witnessed him have a fight with his brother. The last time the brothers fought publically was when they were nineteen, right before Ben decided to retire being a model. He remembers it, it was during a shoot they had. It was a shoot with Russian female twins, he recalls.

Rey shrugged. "Photographers lashing out? That's pretty professional to me."

He laughs again, snorts a little bit too.

"How are you feeling Benny?" Kylo asked then.

Benny? Rey blinked. He calls his brother Benny? That's sweet.

"I'm fine Kylo, thank you."

And just like that they're talking with one another as if they were the best of brothers. She watches quietly as they talk about their parents, work, movies - watches them exchange jokes and laugh.

Rey couldn't help but to be amazed. A few minutes ago they were screaming at each other and now they were talking like best friends. If only the world could see them now.

Ben feels her gaze, it draws his attention to her once more. "I was wondering if you two are free to do take three," Ben began then.

"When?" Kylo and Carrie asked.

"I'm free anytime," Kylo added.

Ben raised his eyebrow. "What about your shoot for Mr. Maryweather?"

Kylo shrugged. "I don't feel like going to Australia. Even if it's paid, I just don't feel like it. I already did four shoots these past two months. I'm kind of tired traveling about. I want to stay around the area for a while."

Ben nodded. "Okay - how about you Rey?"

"I'm free next -

Rey paused as her manager gave her eye contact. "I'm free next Saturday I think but, I have to check my schedule," Rey responded smoothly. Technically she was free pretty much any day but her manager wants her to seem important.

"Saturday's good," Kylo shrugged.

"Okay Saturday it is."

"Will it be in this location?" Carrie asked.

Ben thought for a while. "No. It's going to be in my apartment."

* * *

Saturday:

Carrie couldn't go with her today to the shoot. She was stuck working with another client. "Text me or call me if you need anything," she says to Rey over the phone. Carrie was hesitant for Rey to go to a shoot alone, especially without any crew to be there as witnesses.

"I will," Rey promised. She's fully capable of taking care of herself but she knew Carrie was only looking out for her.

"Do you have enough bus money? Enough for you to get there and come home back?"

Rey laughed. "Yes - and don't worry. I'll be fine, Carrie."

She expects Ben's apartment to be big and spacious.

Check.

She expects it to be in downtown.

Check.

She expects it to be on a high floor.

Check.

"Hey Rey, you're on time," Ben smiled at her.

Rey couldn't help but to examine the place. The place was something out of pinterest, nice and white and modern - wait. This place looks familiar. Has she been here before? "Is Kylo here yet?"

Ben laughed. "Ages ago. Kylo," Ben calls out for him.

No response.

"Hold on, I think he's still asleep in his room. I'll be right back."

His room?

They lived together?

Rey didn't expect that.

The media had been depicting them as estranged brothers who hated each other since they decided to go on different paths in their careers.

Before she can process anything, they were there. Kylo was dressed only from the waist down in dark pants and his hair was disheveled. "I'm sorry. I forgot to turn on my alarm clock."

"You always forget," Ben chuckled.

"You guys share an apartment?" she asked then.

"Yeah. It's cheaper that way," Kylo shrugged.

"But you guys make a lot of m- " Rey stopped herself from completing her sentence.

Ben laughed again. "We're both practical. We see no reason in getting separate apartments by ourselves especially since we're barely here due to work. Often we're gone for weeks, sometimes months."

"Ben not too long ago was gone for four months photographing animals in Washington," Kylo added. "That spread's going to be featured in National Geographic in three months."

Rey blinked. Kylo...sounded very proud of his brother. It was strange. He's so closed off, so distant - so disinterested in everything around him. And yet with his brother, there was pride in his voice.

"Do you have the clothes?" Ben asked. He eyed her - she was wearing a bit of makeup and was dressed in black tank top with a red plaid shirt over and of course, wearing jeans.

"Yeah it's in my bag. Where's the bathroom?"

Simultaneously they pointed her to the direction.

* * *

Rey hesitated to change out of her clothes. First she locked the door and inspected the bathroom, making sure there wasn't any cameras or anything. Carrie tells her to do this every single time for protection. And also to always bring a bottle of water and a portable phone charger. Once everything seemed fine, she does so and quickly. She puts the white silky dress over her clothes and then took everything from underneath. She then slipped the bralette under the dress. She folded her clothes neatly and placed them in her backpack along with her socks and shoes.

She slowly went out of bathroom, holding her backpack awkwardly. She didn't want wrinkle her dress. "Where do I put my backpack?" she asked.

"Anywhere," Kylo shrugged. His gaze lingered. His gaze roamed.

She leaves her bag on the counter and stood there quietly. She suddenly felt as if she standing there naked. She felt intimidated. She felt unsafe. "Where's Ben?" she asked, looking around - looking everywhere but at him. Kylo was still bare from the waist up and his hair was still unruly. He was sitting on the couch with his limbs spread apart lazily.

"He's in the spare room setting up."

"Spare room?"

"We used to have another roommate."

"Oh."

"I wanted to call you," he said then

"What?" she couldn't process his words. It was so out of nowhere and he was so nonchalant about it. Careless.

"I just got busy with work."

"It's fine." I'm not interested, she wanted to say. But she held her tongue for she didn't want to further complicate this arrangement.

"You sure?"

"Yeah." It's just that's such a poor and lazy excuse she wanted to say.

"Okay," Kylo shrugged. He can sense her animosity towards him.

"Okay," she huffed out of frustration. She felt very, very awkward.

She stood there in silence until Ben comes and breaks it.

She follows them, taking her phone with her. Just in case.

The spare room was bare. In the middle of the room was a huge white bed with white covers. Above the bed was a framed painting, a painting of the night lights. It made sense since the room was no longer inhabited. The room was mostly filled by Ben's equipment than anything else.

Rey's heart skipped a beat.

"Relax. There's nothing to be nervous about," Ben said to her gently. He turned on some music then. He plays Maggie Rogers in the background. "Kylo I want you to lay in the middle of the bed. Lay completely flat. And Rey I'm going to take pictures of you getting on the bed, crawling to him. I want you two to look at each other."

* * *

Ben makes Rey slowly crawl to Kylo to capture the whole moment.

He captures the shots from a low three quarter perspective. From this view he could see almost everything. The dress was loose on her and didn't cling on to her. He can see the material of the thin lace bralette that covered her breasts. The dress was rather short and with each movement, the material rose and exposed her bare thighs.

Her face is flushed - her whole body for that matter. He can see the top of her little breasts swelling. Can see her breathing - see her breasts move along her breaths.

He sees Kylo involuntarily flinch his hand out. He wants to touch her exposed skin, Ben knew. Can sense it in his bones. Kylo wanted to slide his hand under her dress and feel her.

Kylo moves his hand back in place. Ben watches as his brother's face stiffen as she's on top of him. It must be torture for Kylo for just being here to capture the experience was agonizing to Ben. They've photographed with many female models before, many attractive ones - all in different shapes and sizes but this, this little kitten was different.

At first it was hard for the brothers to photograph with girls in suggestive positions when they hit their early teens especially but as time went on they got used to it. They became desensitized. But now they felt as if they had hit puberty again and trying to hide their arousals from the simplest of touches.

This view - he can see her nipples poking through the lace bralette, poking through her dress.

Involuntarily Ben licked his lips as Kylo without a thought bucked his hips into her the second her crotch was in contact with his.

"I'm sorry! Am I heavy?" Rey blushed.

Kylo shook his head and stared at her blankly. "No. It's just I'm little sore. A little stiff."

"Do you want to get up and walk around a bit?" Ben asked.

"No," Kylo blurted then. "I'm fine." He made eye contact with his brother then. Ben followed the direction to Kylo's crotch. Kylo was stiff, tenting in his pants.

Ben quickly hushed up then. "Rey move up a bit." He gestures her to move above Kylo's developing erection. "Good Rey now sit down and Kylo, sit up a bit. Rey keep your gaze locked on him."

They do so. She sat on him, completely unaware of the things she was doing to Kylo's body.

"Rey," Ben began in a low voice. "Fix his hair. It's messy because he didn't brush his hair yet."

Rey laughed and does so. Kylo shifted slightly. Her touches are soft - Kylo bit his lip - tugging at it furiously, suppressing a moan from escaping.

Ben's eyes lowered from the sight. "Kylo act aroused. Rey I want you to press your body up against him and Kylo put your hands on her waist."

She shudders from the coldness of his bare chest and fingers on her waist. His fingers are large and they met with the triangle cut outs of her dress.

"Rey, that's good. Act more submissive - Kylo - place your lips on her throat."

Kylo does so without any hesitation.

Ben captures the picture immediately.

Fuck.

She's tensing up from Kylo's lips - her mouth was slightly part open. Her body's responding now.

"Good. Now Kylo place your face in between her chest - is that okay Rey?" he asked. He doesn't want to do anything that will make her feel uncomfortable.

Rey nodded. "Yeah," she said through flushed cheeks.

Such a good little kitten.

Kylo does so then - it's more torture than relief. Her skin is so nice and so warm - he wanted to nuzzle her breasts. He eyed his brother from the side and knew that his brother wanted to do the same thing too.

"Rey stroke his hair," Ben instructed between shots.

Rey does so but slowly. Her body was tensing as she could feel Kylo's breath on her. While his skin was cold, his breath was hot. He rolled his hips again and that's when she feels it, his hardness.

"Kylo, now put your left hand on her thigh."

You're hard, she wanted to say. But she doesn't. He's only doing what he's told. There is nothing sexual actually happening, she reminded herself. It's not like Ben was asking Kylo to finger her.

"Now slowly bring that hand from her thigh and drag it up to her chin."

Rey blushed harder and became frozen. It didn't occur to her how strange this was- that Ben asked his brother - his _twin_ brother to model with her. It didn't occur to her until now that how odd this was. It was as if Ben was conducting some type of weird foreplay with him and her but him in his brother's body. As if he was watching himself be intimate with her.

But maybe Ben asked Kylo because he feels the most comfortable with him. Ben liked his privacy and no other person understood that than Kylo. They were close. They went through the same things, stuck by each others side even to now.

Maggie Roger's voice powers through the shoot. Whenever her mind strays with every new direction, Maggie Roger's voice brings her back to the mood and tone.

 ** _Take me to that space where I need someone_**  
 ** _When I'm shaking or my mind starts coming undone_**  
 ** _When I'm on and off again_**

"There. Thank you, Rey," Ben said as he was finishing the last shots.

And just like that, make believe is over. The environment is calm. Normal.

She hops off of Kylo and retrieves her clothes. She goes back into the bathroom and changes out of the skimpy dress. Before she put on her pants she touched her underwear, touched the developing wetness. She wasn't dripping wet - just a little. She blushed and wondered if Kylo felt it. She shook the thought and pulled on her clothes and socks and shoes.

When she gets out she finds Ben and Kylo talking and laughing with one another in the kitchen.

"Rey do you want to get some ice cream?" Ben offered. "We'll treat you."

"No, it'll be on me," Kylo said to him, playfully nudging him.

Ben rolled his eyes and laughed. "Alright mister high spender." And that warms her, seeing her Kylo open up with his brings his focus on her again. "So what do you say?"

"Why not?" she laughed.

* * *

The next week Ben calls her manager for another part of his series. In that shoot he captures the innocence of the relationship. He photographs scenes of Kylo and Rey walking around downtown at night. Rey liked that that part of the photoshoot the most. It was nice, it was a change of pace. She was fully covered and so was Kylo and they actually all laughed together. They let her into their inside jokes with ice cream. Ben even arranges Kylo and Rey to take a photo of Rey smearing ice cream on Kylo's face.

A week after that he calls her manager again to contact Rey but not for a shoot but to invite her to see his gallery.

And the next week he calls her directly but to spend time with her. He invites her to his apartment and shows her his photo developing process.

Kylo is naturally there, for his brother's gallery opening to happening to be at home when Rey's there. Rey doesn't mind however for he's gradually warming up to her.

Another week rolls again, and Ben calls her this time. He calls her not for work or work related reasons but with the intention of spending time with her. He takes her to an art museum but just him and her. And that's nice - he's nice.

"Can I see you tomorrow. I want to ask you something."

Rey laughed. "Why not now?"

He blushed and fumbled with his glasses. "It's just- not the rig-tht time."

"Alright," she says unafraid. She thinks he's falling for her and maybe that's okay. Because maybe she kind of likes him too.

She comes to their apartment the next night, finding dinner waiting for them. Dinner for two - roasted asparagus and scallops - well almost. Ben made a plate for Kylo too. Rey couldn't help but beam. Ben's so nice. He always thinks about his brother.

"Hi," she says.

"Hi," Ben smiles, unable to hide his wide smile. He fumbled with his glasses again as an attempt to hide his nervousness. He's dressed in almost complete denim, denim pants, denim jacket and a red plaid shirt underneath.

"You're here early," Kylo says as he stumbled out of his room. He's wearing all black from his leather jacket down to his pants.

Rey couldn't help but frown. She found the extra plate thing cute but assumed Kylo was out and the plate was for when he came back in the middle of the night. She was hoping to have some alone time with Ben at least - just to listen to what he wanted to tell her. It didn't occur to her how Kylo was always there.

"Kylo, is it okay me and him have at least five minutes alone? He wants to talk to me about something in private."

Kylo raised his eyebrow at her. "Rey I don't think you -

"No it's alright," Ben assured. "Kylo can stay."

She raised her eyebrow. "Okay? What is it?"

"There's no way - well - I've been - er-

Ben was nervous.

"You can tell me anything," she coaxed him, giving him a small smile.

He blushed then. "I've been wanting to ask you this for a while - I just didn't know how to ask - or when to ask but -" he exhaled then.

"But?" she asked as her heart was pounding frantically.

"Rey I was wondering if you can be our girlfriend."

Wait -what? _Our?_ "What did you say?" she asked. She was becoming pale.

Ben and Kylo exchanged a look with one another. "He means we," Kylo spoke then. "We're wondering if you want to be our girlfriend," he corrected.


	5. Skin Tight Velvet Pink Dress

Chapter Four: Skin Tight Velvet Pink Dress

* * *

Her mouth fell open. "You can't be serious - this is -

They stared at her with confusion.

Wait...was she? Was she dating the both of them the whole time? She thought she was sort of dating Ben. It didn't occur to her that she was sort of dating Kylo too. They never said anything - but then again neither did she-

"Why would we joke with something like this?" Ben asked her.

Rey took a step back as her shoulders began to tense. If this was a movie, she would be killed on the spot and found in the dumpster the next morning. But this wasn't a movie. This was real life - this was reality - this...this was something else. She heard rumors about them, how odd they were but this...this was too absurd and far fetched for the media to ever make up.

"Certainly you must know what polyamory is, Kylo said calmly.

"Of course I do -

"How do you feel about it?" Ben asked. "About polyamory relationships?"

"I never been in one," she blurted out. "Nor desire to be in one - I mean I judge people who are in one as long as it's consensual " Blood rushed to her face. "But this -

"But what?" they both asked.

"You're brothers. It's -

Kylo laughed then. "Do you honestly think that my brother and I have sex with one another? We have sex with our partner, we share a partner."

Wait- what? _Our partner?_ "You -you-," Rey could barely make out words. She shook her head, shaking some sense back in. "You guys...done this before?" her voice was low.

"Yeah," Ben answered for them. His tone was calm. At ease. "We've been in two polyamorous relationships. Exclusively with our former girlfriends."

"I don't judge or anything with people who are in poly relationships - it's just not my preference," Rey explained the best she could. Her cheeks were getting redder by the second. "I don't think those end well," she admitted.

"It's slightly different than normal relationships but not as much," Ben clarified to her.

"Did...did they last long?" Rey couldn't help but to ask. She knew she was burying a hole for herself but she couldn't help but to be curious.

"The first one, we were with her for two years. and The second one we were with her for three years," Kylo said then. "Naturally people drift and some relationships don't work out, just like normal ones. We've also dated separately but they didn't last as long due to our schedules."

"We find it easier sharing a girlfriend," Kylo added. "Just like an apartment. We're constantly away and by sharing a partner, we're able to be there for her."

" She'll never be alone," Ben explained to her softly.

"But - how about your family? Do they know?"

Ben and Kylo looked at each other and laughed. "Oh they know."

"How do they feel about it?"

"They accept it," Ben answered.

Rey blinked. "Really?" Where they...where they so abused by the industry that it led to this? Their codependency with having a relationship?

"Yeah. Our parents are in one too and have been before we were born," Kylo explained to her. "They're still with their partner to this day."

"Are you close with your...parent's partner?" Rey asked doubtfully.

"Yeah he's been around our lives since forever," Ben chuckled. "He's our uncle, our mother's twin to be exact. They don't have sex with one another - they have sex with our dad."

"Did that...affect you guys growing up?"

"Anything a parent does affects their child," Ben reminded her. "Whenever dad and mom were separated, our uncle stepped in as the father figure. So we're never alone. We always had both parental figures."

Shit. It all makes sense - Ben's easy going nature and Kylo's nomadic tendencies. They were raised by hippies and grew up underneath the spotlight - this - this was too much for her to handle. This - this sounded terribly, terribly unhealthy. Borderline incest.

"I have to go," she said immediately grabbing her things.

They don't stop her. The don't say anything.

Instead they let her go.

* * *

The next morning, she wakes up to a text.

Ben.

It was a text from Ben:

 **We're sorry for scaring you. But just think about it. Either way the choice is yours and we'll understand. We'll understand if you don't want to ever speak to us again. Take care.**

She stared at the message for a long time.

This - this doesn't feel real. To make it worse she felt alone. She didn't know who she could talk to about this. She couldn't talk to Finn about it either because this - this was personal - a personal secret and she felt she had no right to let anyone know unless the brothers wanted to. If the news slipped out, the brothers' lives would be ruined. In danger. Their careers will be gone.

Instead, she thinks about it. Thinks about it for a whole week.

She didn't want to think about it.

She didn't.

But the thought kept creeping up on her. How would they...exactly do it? Like what type of positions? And how would the relationship would be dictated? They said they were exclusive with their partners and were long term with them - but how about the future? What if they wanted to have kids? Would she carry just one brother's children or the both of them?

Her curiosity got the best of her.

But her thoughts switch then, to her sensibility. They were in two poly relationships and those ended. That had to mean something - but then again just like any other relationship.

Complicated was an understatement.

* * *

"I'm scared," she tells them. It's the next day, a day after allowing a week for her to process her thoughts. She was standing there, in front of their doorsteps.

"There's nothing to be scared about," Ben's voice was soft. Like velvet. "Rey, we promise we're not going to hurt you - does that you mean you accept?"

Kylo stepped closer to her. "Do you want to be our girlfriend?"

Rey bit her lip. "I-I don't know," she admitted. "To be honest - I don't know why I'm here."

There was a pause.

She sighed and stared at the air. "I'm worried this will end horribly."

"We can't promise what's going to happen," they both said. In unison. They were halves to a piece.

"Just like any relationship, things happen, Rey," Ben reminded her. He took a step closer to her while Kylo stayed in the distance. Like he always did. "People drift. People lose interest. People fall out of love. The only thing we can promise is to treat you the best we can."

"I'm broken," her voice was low. She's extremely terrified of being with two people. She was abandoned when she was six years old and never had anyone that wanted her. Her whole life was jumping from different foster parents. No one ever wanted her. She's eighteen now, a few months out of the foster system. And since then she's been living on her own using modeling to make ends meet. They know that. They know even though she's making money and will be able to get financial aid, she's still hesitant to enroll. She wants to save up longer to have a nice cushion for whatever happens. They know that. They know she's young. They know she's never had someone. And she's afraid of breaking them apart.

"It's okay, so are we," Kylo said. "We were raised by a senator mom and a former movie star dad turned pilot that's rarely around," he reminded her. "We're far from whole. You're fucked up, just like us."

His words don't comfort her.

But Ben's does. "This lifestyle isn't for everyone but we feel that it is for you. We can give you so much love, more love than any one person can ever provide."

She crossed her arms and thought for a moment. "Can we...try it out a bit?"

They nodded. Simultaneously. Always.

* * *

The relationship...it's...it's hard for her to adjust.

She's never been in a relationship before - she sort of had but they were short lived or just an encounter.

"So is our relationship -

"Exclusive? Yes," Ben answered her. "It's just us, exclusively. No other partners - cheating is not acceptable - does that bother you?"

"No," she said immediately. "I'm happy with that -" she paused and stared at Kylo. He was sitting on the far end of the couch watching TV while she and Ben were discussing. Shouldn't...shouldn't he be here to discuss too?

But she remembers that he's not good with words.

It's funny because there's this character the media has depicted him to be - to be the loud twin, to be the playboy. The wild card. He may seem more social to the public but it's all an act, all publicity stunts. But in real life, behind close doors he wasn't. He's not. He's a loner. The only thing the media got right was that he was moody, standoffish.

While in close doors he's quieter, Ben spoke more. Ben spoke more in privacy.

They were both so private.

"We'll have a group text," Ben said then.

"Will we date or is this more of a physical -

"We'll date, Rey we're a relationship now."

A relationship. She can barely process that.

"Kylo prefers dating behind closed doors so you and I will go out on outside dates on our own."

"The media once they put two and two together, will just assume you and I are dating."

"Well it's better that they think that than for them to find out the truth," Kylo murmured in the background, finally saying something.

"So does that I mean I can only show affection outside with Ben?" she raised her eyebrow.

"Yeah," Ben said. "That's how the situation has always been like."

"Ben tell her about the room," Kylo hollered. He changed the channel.

"Right! I can't believe I forgot. Rey the spare room will be your room when you come by. That room will be the place where we have sex together. However there will be some occasions that we will want to sleep with you separately. That'll be done in our rooms."

"Has that room always been for your partner?"

Ben blushed and that was enough of an answer for her. "We change beds and get another one when it ends. It's basically a new room and we'll fill it up with gifts for you."

Rey nodded. It didn't seem too bad.

* * *

The first weeks of their relationship is innocent.

Ben texts her every morning and night and sometimes tells her what Kylo wants to say to her. Kylo rarely texts her and so most of his thoughts are being sent by Ben.

Rey's not surprised. He's never good with communication.

Ben asks her about her day throughout while Kylo only manages to send two texts such as if she had eaten or had gotten enough sleep.

She's able to see why they work better together, as a unit.

Ben sends her gifts now and then. He sends her things like flowers and little things he think she would like - like records and CDS or cute stickers or zines and art books.

Her dates with Ben are nice. He took her to his favorite record store one day, took her around to do some errands with him on another day, and they went to a different museum in a different city the next week and an antique store the following week. It was nice.

Every time she comes to the room - the spare room, she finds the room being more filled. She knows that gestures from Kylo because Ben's personal while Kylo was practical. He gets her things like a desk for when she does go to school. He gets her things like nice comforters or decorations for the room - practical things. Sensible things. He doesn't say much or is involved as much with the relationship since he's busy with work so little things mean a lot.

In their space, in the apartment, is when she feels safe to be herself. That's when they are able to spend time as a whole couple together.

They order delivery and have activities for them to do like doing a puzzle or paint clay figures.

They were artsy, the brothers. Rey's not surprised. Kylo and Ben were raised by hippies and were constantly surrounded by art.

Music is always played in the apartment.

Always.

Their other activities consisted of cooking together, trying out a recipe they found on pinterest.

Sometimes they'll make practical foods like chicken and some sort of vegetable but most times they made desserts like frosted animal cookie bark or watermelon cupcakes.

The first weeks were nice. It felt like they were hanging out just like before they asked her to be their girlfriend.

It wasn't until the next month when they asked her about affection.

"Who do you want to kiss you first?" Ben asked her.

Rey looked up from the book. They were reading earlier - er rather she was reading the book to them. The question caught her off guard. They were dating for a month and have yet to kiss let alone be intimate with one another. The most she's done was hold hands with Ben whenever it was just the two of them. She hadn't felt comfortable to do that with Kylo let alone anything else.

She stared at him and then Kylo. She can see that it's been on their mind for a while. They were hesitant about who would be first and so danced around the decision until now. Reasonably she wanted Ben to kiss her first but since he spent the most time with her, it was only fair for Kylo to kiss her. "I want Kylo to kiss me," she blushed, mumbling underneath her breath. Kylo hasn't been around much since he's caught up with shoots. She should share her time with them equally.

Kylo seems surprised by her choice, she could tell. She can tell by how his eyes shifted slightly before returning to a blank state. Kylo remained still. Wordless.

Ben placed the book down. "Kiss her," he instructed Kylo.

"No, she doesn't want me to kiss her. She's just being polite. She wants you to kiss her first."

Ben shook her head. "No, she doesn't. She likes you very much."

"No she doesn't."

Her heart skipped a beat. Because maybe that's true. She feels more comfortable with Ben than she did with Kylo.

"Rey," Ben gestured her to sit on top of Kylo.

She does. Without thinking, she does. Kylo blinked at her several times and so did she.

This. This was awkward.

Ben chuckled. "I don't believe it. You guys literally bleed out sensual vibes during your shoots and yet you guys are shy without one another?"

"This is different," she spat out. Her cheeks blood red. "This is forced. I want my first kiss with him to be natural."

She feels Kylo's body start to relax.

"She's not ready," Kylo stated to Ben. He sounded annoyed. "It's okay. Come on, let's just watch a movie."

* * *

Couples cuddle when they watch movies. She wondered how she cuddle the both of them.

"Rey, lay down on our laps," they both said.

She raised her eyebrow but she doesn't question it. Instead she does what she is told. She lays herself on their laps, lays on her side with her head on Kylo's lap. She feels like cat, being stroked by her owner - owners. During the whole movie the would both stroke her. Ben would stroke her back and hair while Kylo would stroke her hands.

Kylo would stroke her fingertips and then pull away. He would do this whenever there was a serious part happening in the movie. But by the end of the movie her fingers latched on to his.

And that was the first time they held hands.

"You're such a cute Kitten," Ben says, in relief of Kylo And Rey starting to warm up to one another.

"Kitten?" she lifted her head.

He blushed. "That's my nickname for you."

"That's our nickname for you," Kylo corrected.

* * *

Ben was worried. He's worried that Rey won't ever to warm up to Kylo.

He knows that she's distant since the whole incident between them and their almost hookup months ago. Kylo feels that Rey is more of Ben's girlfriend than his.

"You have to spend more time with her. Talk to her more," he tells his brother. "She doesn't know you as much as I do."

Kylo frowned and sighed. "I feel like she only accepted to be our girlfriend to be with you."

Ben doesn't believe it one bit. He felt the energy between them in their shoot, he felt their passion. "That's not true -

"Ben," Kylo's voice was firm.

"Kylo, she likes you - she just needs a push from you."

"I only do well if the relationship is physical and so far our relationship isn't physical."

"Well you have to push it in that direction. She wants you to kiss her."

* * *

Ben knows that Kylo's not going to do anything unless he feels that Rey was willing. So he decided to take matters in his own hands. The next week, he tells them that he wants to do another shoot. They agree unaware that it was just a red herring.

He has the shoot in the spare room again.

He has Kylo dressed from the waist down again but for Rey he has her wear something different. He has her wear a dusty rose pink velvet dress. The dress was short but it was flowing. Ben asked her not to wear underneath the dress since the fabric was so thin. He didn't want any outlines.

Rey only agrees to because it's between them and no one else.

Ben instructs her to go on Kylo's lap in a similar fashion as the shoot they done before.

Nothing feels different to her. She feels comfortable this time because this is the third time she's done an intimate shoot with Kylo.

"I want you to put your hands on her waist Kylo," he instructed in a normal tone. "Good, now Rey, press against him and sit up a little bit higher - wrap your arms around his neck."

They do. They do because this was their job.

The dress feels soft on Kylo's skin.

"Rey, press your body more to the right side."

But her breasts felt softer.

This stuns Kylo a bit - he involuntarily looked down. The dress hugged her body, it was like another layer of flesh. He couldn't find the lining of any padding. He could only feel her breasts poking through the fabric. Her nipples were hard, cold. In search for warmth.

"Rey," Ben's voice was low as he took another shot. "I want you to move back - and make little space - there. And now Rey, I want you to shift a bit."

She does so.

Ben suppressed a smile. He knows his brother. He knows how much he liked velvet. "Good. Kylo I want you to kiss her shoulders - good - now lick her collarbone."

They do so. They do every little instruction.

"Stroke her hair - good - kiss her - kiss her slowly - Rey pull back slightly - Kylo look at her. Blink. Beg. Good now kiss her again, tilt her face and kiss her harder this time. I want you to grab a bit of her skirt and hold on to it tight. Suck on her bottom lip Kylo, tug on it. Rey pretend how much you want him to be on top of you."

Their bodies were becoming flushed. He can hear them panting, his favorite brother and their Kitten. He liked the sound, liked how very compliant they were.

They were submersed into the scene that they kept kissing one another without any other instruction. Ben watches and continues capturing the moment.

"Uh," she groaned. Her cheeks were flushed and so were Kylo's.

"What's wrong?" Kylo asked immediately. He was panicking.

"Nothing - it's just you're hard."

"I'm sorry -

"Don't be," Ben said. He's tired of them running around this. They wanted each other and were too afraid. "Kylo I want you to keep kissing her - Rey I want you to unzip his pants."

Kylo and Rey looked at him.

"What?" Rey asked.

"Don't worry, your dress is long enough none of the viewers will be able to see it."

Before she can say anything, Kylo kisses her again. And pulls her back into the act. She unzipped his pants and his erection comes out through the slit of his pants without any refusal. He's hard, throbbing. He's thick, very thick. Clear liquid was trickling out of him. She became aware she was wet now - or had been wet as well. His moans were becoming stronger from the sight of her gaze on to his erection.

"Rey, you have to relieve him. I want you to grind your pussy against him."

"Ben," Kylo hissed.

"Stop acting like you don't want that."

She wants to and so she does.

"Fuck," Kylo cursed. No wonder why he was harder than usual. She wasn't wearing any panties. He was feeling her the whole time without any layer of fabric to protect them.

"Is she wet Kylo?" Ben asked. He continued to take pictures. From his lens' view this was all innocent. In the picture it looks like she's just holding him. The camera does not see that she was naked underneath the dress. The camera does not see that she was rubbing her cunt against his Kylo's dick.

"Yes - fuck," Kylo growled. He gripped on her waist as he heard the shutter sound.

"Keep kissing her," Ben ordered. "I want you to show how much you like her."

Kylo obeys.

"Kylo how wet is she? Tell me." Ben likes it. He likes seeing her attracted and passionate with his brother. He liked seeing her love her brother as much as she felt about him.

"She's very wet. Soaping. A mess," he growled. He moved along her movements.

"Kitten do you like it? Does your boyfriend feel good?" Ben asked her in gentler tone.

"Yes," she said as she panted.

"That's great. I want you to take his dick. Every inch. Do you think you can do that?"

"Just make sure you don't capture any expose skin," she said.

"I promise."

"Wait," Kylo yelled. "Are you sure Ben? Don't you want to have sex with her first?"

Ben shook his head. "I want you to have this experience." Ben knew damn well Kylo wanted to have sex with her from the first time he had met her.

Kylo turned and found Rey nodding in approval.

Kylo lifted the front of her skirt to help her find him. "You're so beautiful, Kitten," he whispered.

"Because I'm doing this?"

He shook his head. "No because you like us both."

"I do like you both. I never said that I didn't," she grinned. He wrapped his hands around her and slowly ease her down to his dick.

She's tight. She's so small. She winced a bit when his tip entered her. He grabbed her hand and have her squeeze his hand. He kissed her hard and made sure her skirt was down as he slid her body down - down to the base. She squeezed his hand hard as the pressure sharpened. She bit her lip and tried to suppress her screams. He's big - he's tearing through her - it hurts. Tears ran through her eyes. He kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry Kitten for hurting you." Kylo pulled her out and stroked her hair.

"I'm fine," she tells them as they went to tend to her. They hugged her and whispered words of regret. "Please stop worrying." She was fine. She knew that this was supposed to happen.

"I know," they both said.

Ben placed the camera down and went to retrieve a cloth that was soaked in warm water. Kylo laid her down and lifted her skirt as Ben wiped the blood away. Kylo kissed her forehead as Ben wiped the evidence away.

"Are you okay?" Ben petted her hair.

"I'm fine - I want to do it again."

They looked at her in confusion.

She laughed. "I figured it'll be easier to have the pain over with than for you guys to smother me."

"Are you sure?" Kylo asked.

Rey nodded. "And Ben," she calls out for him.

"Yes, Rey?"

"I want you to keep taking pictures."

Ben nodded and turned the volume louder.

She positioned herself again - it still hurts - but not as much. She focuses of the music - focuses on the feeling of soft lips being pressed against her as Kylo made his way into her. She winced. This pressure was overbearing - rupturing at her.

Once he was in he started to move up into her. Thrusting up and down. Slow and slower. She interlocked her fingers with his and squeezed tight.

The pictures Ben was taking show none of this. The camera doesn't see Kylo's dick inside of her. The camera doesn't see him fucking her. No. The camera only sees a woman and man holding each other.

The pain was becoming pleasurable for her, Ben knew.

He can tell by the way she was looking at the both of them. And by the sound of her voice. She comes then, Ben knew by the way Kylo and Rey both paused for a moment and then ended up moaning together and moving back in pace.

"Turn off the camera," Kylo ordered.

Ben nodded.

The second he did, Kylo rolled on top of Rey and fucked her into the bed. She comes for the second time. He grabbed her seconds after she does and positions her to be sitting on top of him with her back to this face. He kept thrusting into her as he pulled the dress over her shoulders.

He tossed the dress to the floor carelessly and thrusted harder.

Faster.

He cupped her chin. "I want you to look at Ben as I fuck you, okay Kitten?" Kylo ordered her.

Rey does so but not from his orders but her curiosity. Ben was sitting in chair, rubbing at his own erection. He was staring at her, staring every inch of her exposed body. His eyes were half lidded and heavy as he slowly took off his pants and ran his hand along his shaft. He licked his lips at her, watching as her body bounced. She bit her lipsin response.

"I want you to tell him how much you like him," Kylo said as he bit her neck. Her body responded well to his teeth. She shuddered in pleasure.

"Ben I like you," she says.

"What do you like about him?" Kylo asked.

His dick isn't as thick, she examined. It was long, longer than Kylo's. She wondered how that felt. "I like how sweet you are. I like how selfless you are. You care about me and you care about Kylo. I like that. I like how passionate you are with your work. I like how you include me. I like you so much."

Kylo stopped fucking her. "Now show him how much you like him."

She pulled herself out this time. Kylo hissed but he doesn't say anything after. Instead he followed her.

"Ben how do you want me?" she asked through a grin. This - this was - god she never felt like this before. This turned her on - being watched - being loved - being shared.

"He wants you to crawl on your knees Rey, be a good little Kitten for him," Kylo said for him. "He's too nervous to say it but he thinks it. He wants to do dirty and rough things to you just like me."

Kylo followed her as she went down and crawled to his brother. Kylo stood behind her and watched. Watched as she grabbed Ben's cock and touched it a bit, teasing him before licking him.

Ben moaned, gripping on to the arms of the chair.

"Stop teasing him. Suck him off," Kylo ordered. "Do you like his long dick?"

Rey didn't answer. But instead sucked Ben.

"Answer me."

She doesn't.

She likes teasing the both of them. She feels Ben's fingers in her hair. She looked up and found him softly smiling at her in admiration and want. She sucked slower and batted her eyelashes. She stopped sucking and kissed him.

Ben pulls her up and kisses her deeper. He parts her mouth open and lets his tongue roam around to taste her.

The moment is cut abrupt when she feels something moist.

She looked down and found a damp cloth in between her legs. "What the fuck Kylo?" she screamed.

"I'm cleaning you off for him."

Rey couldn't help but to laugh. "That's sweet."

"Why are you laughing?"

"Just your timing," she laughed.

Ben lifted her and placed her on the bed.

Kylo kept his distance and stayed behind.

Ben gestured for him to join them.

"Are you sure, Ben?" Kylo asked.

Ben nodded. "We haven't showed her what's it like with being our girlfriend.

Kylo smiled at him wickedly. He took off the rest of his clothes and joined them. They have her lay in the middle. They took turns kissing her. Ben first and then Kylo.

Back and forth.

Quick kisses.

Playful kisses.

Their hands played with her breasts. They both tugged on her nipples as they nuzzled the sides of her neck.

"You like that Kitten?"

She doesn't know who said it but she nodded.

"You're such a dirty girl. We like that so much," Kylo bit on her neck, leaving a mark.

"Close your eyes," Ben said.

Rey does so. She feels a swipe of warmth on her nipples - and then cool air being blown on them. She shuddered and then she found herself squealing as she felt a sucking sensation. She opens her eyes and found them sucking on her breasts - Kylo on the left and Ben on the right. Her legs twitched out of surprise.

Ben slipped a finger into her folds. "Don't worry we haven't forgotten this," he grinned.

She laid there, watching them suck on her breasts. She watched in surprise and amazement at the sight of two grown men share her so peacefully. It felt so good - having the both of them there. Kylo was sucking on her hard and nuzzling her while Ben, he was strategic. He rotated between sucking her nipple. He would pull away and massage her breast and tug on her nipple until it was harden and blow warm breaths before sucking on her again. He lets her experience changing temperatures - lets her experience different speeds and the warmth of his mouth.

She was becoming so wet. She was spilling on to the sheets.

She watches as Ben pulled away and pull Kylo away to stop.

Kylo grunted but Ben laughed.

He led Ben in between her legs.

She watches them slowly travel down - but she got distracted from the sight of her breasts. Her left breast looked completely bruised. There were teeth marks everywhere while the other had only hints of red and teasing.

"Kylo do you know what you're doing down there?" she teases. "I don't want my pussy to be all beaten up."

"You weren't complaining earlier," he countered.

"It's okay Rey, I'll make sure he's gentle," Ben gave her a lopsided smile.

She parts her legs open for them. She laid there, completely still in anticipation.

"Can I?" Ben asked Kylo.

"I'm not a greedy bastard," Kylo laughed. "You already let me kiss her and have sex with her first."

Ben shrugged. "Just asking."

"Wait," Kylo said.

"What?"

Kylo took off Ben's glasses.

"Thanks."

Ben fingered her first until she was wet again. He spread her wetness all around until she was twitching again. He dipped his face and slowly licked her in streaks. Up and down. Around. In circles. "Does that feel good?" he asks.

"Do you even have to fucking ask?" Rey laughed.

He eats her out then, digging his tongue deeper and deeper into her. She was becoming wetter and wetter by the second. He sucked on her then, sucked until she was twisting about.

"Say his name," Kylo said.

"Ben," she whimpered. "That feels so good Ben."

The boys both moaned to the sound of her voice.

Ben forced himself away - away from her sweetness and taste and gestured Kylo to lick her. "Let's take turns," Kylo said. Kylo leaned down and licked her in excitement.

"Kylo, be more gentle, she's not food," Ben said.

"Sorry," he licked her slowly this time, in a few strokes and then gestured for Ben to take his turn. And they did that. They took turns. It felt so good, to have two tongues licking at her - to have two mouths eating her out.

She came one time and they licked her off, licked her until she was dry.

It wasn't until she felt weak down there that she asked them to stop. They do so and went back to her to be near her. They rested their cheeks on her shoulders.

"Benny, you and Rey haven't sex with each other yet," Kylo frowned.

"It's okay we can do it another time," she tells them.

"Another time?" they looked up at her eagerly.

"Well I assume so since I am your girlfriend."


	6. Developed Photos

Chapter Five: Developed Photos

* * *

It's strange seeing herself in published photos. Rey doesn't recognize herself in them, she just sees a glammed up version of herself - or how her boyfriends describe it, a sex kitten. But she's not like that. She's Rey. She doesn't wear makeup other then her shoots. She doesn't go around in heels and short skirts. She wore jeans and her favorite flannel and a bare face full of freckles.

She bit her lip as her eyes shifted to the next photo of her and Kylo.

It was more strange to see photos of herself in a gallery, in a photo series - in her boyfriend's photo series. Her being in magazines was one thing but to be in a gallery? That was a different animal. It was sort of embarrassing being here - being in the gallery with photos of her and Kylo's recent shoot. People weren't just looking at her in photos, they were looking at her in person. It was especially embarrassing because the photos were of her and Kylo's first time. It doesn't look like it in the photos - it just looks like she was sitting on him and they were looking at each other in awe. Her face went red. If only the people knew she had her boyfriend's dick inside of her during the whole shoot.

She turned to look at Kylo and softened at the sight of his tensed shoulders.

He felt uncomfortable too.

She gave him a small smile at the stoic man.

He doesn't respond and instead went away to get some appetizers that were being offered. Rey doesn't mind it. She knows they had to be distant in public. No one's supposed to know about their relationship - her and Kylo...and Ben. She scanned the whole museum until she found him - Ben. He was off in the corner, conversing with other artists and wealthy people. She suppressed a smile and pretends to barely know him.

"Those pictures are beautiful. Your chemistry with Kylo is unlike anything I've seen in my life."

Rey turned and found someone standing right beside her - Hux.

"I was a model for one of your shoots," she said quietly, reminding him. That was her first shoot with Kylo...the shoot that started it all.

He smirked and flicked his hair from his face. "I know. I remember you." Hux took a step closer and examined the photos in its entirety. A set of five photos. A set of different emotions and shifted movements. "Ben Solo captured the mood of sensuality perfectly."

"You sound surprised."

Hux laughed. "Perhaps a little bit. It's hard to capture the feelings of sex and emotion but he did it. That bastard did it. He has to teach me his techniques. The last models I used for my project had to be scrapped because the mood they were conveying was too pornographic. This - this is great - I can feel movement and emotion and the aesthetic - it's just a beautiful piece. Tell him that he has to share his secret with me with getting models to cooperate."

"Why don't you ask him yourself? He's over there," Rey pointed.

"You're closer to him and I don't mean distance."

Rey's heart skipped a beat as Hux walked away.

* * *

Ben senses her distress. He can sense it from the distance. He eyed Kylo, eyed him to stay in place as Ben tended to their girlfriend. He pulls her aside, away from the people. Away from their eyes. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly.

"Hux talked to me earlier," she responded with a quieter voice. "I think he knows about you and me."

"People will only take it as a rumor," he assured her.

"That's it? You're not going to do anything?"

"What can I do? Rey if I do something, it'll only work against us and be evidence in his favor."

Rey bit her lip and sighed. "You're right. It's just - I don't know I feel like he's going to do something."

"What did he talk to you about. What does he want?"

"He just said he wanted you to teach him how to get the same aesthetic."

Ben chuckled and brushed it off. "There's nothing to worry. He's always been competitive with Kylo and I for as long as I could remember."

"Competitive?"

He nodded. "Yeah like years ago when we were in our teens, a clothing brand decided to drop him and use Kylo and me for their line. Ever since then, he's always trying to best us. I'm pretty sure he only became a photographer because I became one."

"Or maybe it's because he's too ugly to get a job," Kylo added as he entered the conversation.

Ben eyed Kylo sternly.

Kylo shrugged indifferently. "I know I shouldn't stand so close but I'm bored," he said as he put his hands into his pockets.

Ben gestured for Rey to look around the rest of the gallery. She does so without a second thought.

Kylo waits until she was away from hearing distance to speak. "So what's all this talk about the Nazi?"

"I think he knows."

Kylo frowned. "About us or - you and Rey?"

"Us. All three of us."

* * *

The following day, Ben runs into him - Hux. He runs into the red headed man at the art store. "Hey long time no see," Hux said in the matter of formality.

Ben painted a smile. "It was nice of you to attend my gallery yesterday. Thank you."

Hux nodded. "What are friends for?"

They were everything but that. Ben nodded. "How are you?"

"The usual." The usual was working for companies while trying to squeeze personal projects and recreation.

"Same."

"You? The usual?" Hux laughed. "Not after looking at your gallery series yesterday. Your photos are amazing, Solo. You have to show me your techniques in getting models to portray emotion."

Ben chuckled. "It's no skill - I just got lucky with the models."

Hux rolled his eyes in disbelief and laughed. "I used them not too long ago, used them before you and I couldn't get them to display that type of tension and chemistry. Certainly you must have a technique."

"Just years of directing I guess," Ben said as he started to walk around the store.

"Maybe it's easier because it's with your brother."

"Possibly," Ben forced himself to laugh.

"Or was it difficult? To have your twin model for you?"

"It was a bit strange at first," he admitted. "But after a few minutes it was just like working with any other model."

"She's such a pretty girl," Hux commented, following Ben. "Don't you think so too?"

He shrugged. "She's not the first girl I've worked with. I mean she's pretty but so are the other models."

"But this is the first time you had a model be part of multiple series."

"She's only been in two of my projects -

"That's more than any other models you've had in your work."

Ben repressed himself from sighing. "I suppose you're right."

"I can't get over how steamy the photos were. It felt as if they were having sex in the photos."

Ben laughed.

Hux smirked, sensing Ben's discomfort. "I've worked with the both of them before. Their interactions are something else. I remember feeling as if I was witnessing a mating a ritual between them. They look really good together don't they?"

"Yes. Yes they do," Ben nodded in agreement.

"I think they would make a good couple."

Ben laughed. "Oh that's a nice thought but you know how my brother is."

"Yes but I noticed a change in him yesterday. They barely interacted but he kept his eyes on her. He seemed very interested. Attentive. Territorial. And every time she was away from his sight he seemed disheartened."

Ben frowned. "You overthink things, Hux."

Hux laughed. "Perhaps you're right. Because yesterday I sworn you did the same thing too. I don't know - maybe I confused you with Kylo - oh wouldn't that be a cute headline, two models fall in love after working together."

"It wouldn't make much news. Models and actors fall for each other all the time."

"It will if it involves the Solos falling in love with a model they work with. I mean a Solo."


	7. Rumors

Chapter Six: Rumors

* * *

There's this vicious rumor floating around. About her. That she's sleeping with the brothers in order to get work and advance her status. Rey doesn't blame the tabloids for spreading such a rumor for everything circulating about her and her career seemed too picture perfect; a young teen girl decides to be a model and several months in is already modeling for high end projects and fashion companies. Rey knows that she is lucky for everything to fall together in place but it hurt her. It hurt to find out that tabloids were painting her in such a cruel manner.

There were other variations of the rumor but all were overall identical - that she was using her body in her favor.

There was a particular version that made her sick to her stomach - that she was sleeping with Ben in order to manipulate him into hiring her even though she was secretly in love with his brother. That stung. Because that's how the world's going to see her and no matter what she does, she's going to be seen as the girl the media had made her look to be.

"Rey, they're just rumors," Ben assured, stroking her hair. She was laying on her side, resting on her boyfriends' laps. "It doesn't matter what the media says because none of those things are true."

She sniffled and wiped her tears. Earlier she had been on her phone and discovered discussion posts about her and received messages on her Instagram asking which brother she was dating and how easy she was and how much she charged for sex. She's been put down before, countless times in her life but never to this extent or at the count of thousands swarming after her. She went to reach for Kylo's hand but he didn't respond. She felt herself shut down then as she thought of her life before. She didn't think she would miss the simplicity of being no one, just a girl trying to get by. Just a girl fresh out of the foster system.

"People like drama," Ben reminded her. "The media is only feeding into it. Besides none of these reports are ever accurate. The truth is too dull for them."

Kylo sat there in silence and stared at her. Her head was on his lap but she was turned from him, shielded from the sight of her pain.

"If the truth's is so dull why won't we tell them?"

"Rey, you know that our relationship is unconventional. It won't be accepted. We can't risk it."

"And what have them believe that I'm a heartless whore?" she snapped.

"We can't control how people see us -

"You're wrong," Kylo said then.

She lifted her head. "What?"

"My comment is for Ben," Kylo said in a low tone. He sounded irritated.

"What are you trying to say?" Ben asked in astonishment.

"Rey go wait for us in your room," Kylo ordered.

She does so without a question.

He waits. Kylo waits until he hears her shut the door.

"What's wrong?" Ben asked.

"It's your fault that she's hurt," Kylo snapped, his jaw was twitching.

Ben raised his eyebrow but remained calm. "What did I do?"

"You were supposed to make your relationship with Rey public. And yet you haven't done it yet even though you two have been spotted and photographed in public countless times."

"You already know that I wanted to do it when the time was right. It was too early to make it public -

"Well it's too late to announce it now. These freaking rumors is going to affect her from getting other shoots and jobs. You tarnished her reputation."

"What did you want me to do? To announce it even though it was too soon? For all we know the relationship could have only lasted a month."

"We already had a room made for her during that time," Kylo shouted, pointing at the room. It made his blood boil that Ben didn't see the seriousness of their relationship or take account that Kylo had been filling her room with decorations and essentials since day one.

"I'll make the relationship public once we hit six months. It's only three months in -

"The longer you wait, the more you're going to make it worse especially now that you two are being recognized frequently whenever you guys go out."

"Kylo, you shouldn't be putting your anger on me," Ben kept his voice leveled. It was better to keep himself level headed while Kylo was on a rampage. "I know you're upset but why are you making a big deal out of this?" he said gently as he watched Kylo pace around in circles. "This happens. This always happens whenever we have a girlfriend."

"You act like I don't fucking know! Of course I fucking know -

"Why are you so angry about this? You usually understand when it happens. Whenever we're around any girl, rumors circulate. It's always been like this."

Kylo stopped in place and glared at his brother. "Because this is affecting Rey. This is hurting her."

"She will get through it."

"Ben she's not like the other models. She's still new. She's still a kid. She's not used to our world and I hate seeing her get hurt from it."

"We've discussed this Kylo," Ben said gently. "We've discussed this together before she became our girlfriend. We already discussed the repercussions of having a relationship with a new model."

Kylo gritted his teeth and shook his head. "Don't use that damn tone."

"What tone?"

"You're talking about her as if she's one of your workers. She's not. She's your girlfriend, Ben, _our_ girlfriend. AND I'M STILL FUCKING PISSED THAT YOU RELEASED THOSE PHOTOS," Kylo threw a lamp on the ground, shattering it. "I told you I was against it and you completely disregarded my feelings."

"Those photos were beautiful -

"Those photos were _private_ ," Kylo tightened his hands into fists. "You had no right in using them for your damn project."

Ben stood up. "It wasn't like you two were naked -

Kylo sneered. "And that makes it okay? Ben you released photos of Rey and I having sex. You photographed our first time and shared it out to the world." Kylo frowned, remembering the horror he felt in the gallery as people examined the work and took photos of it. He remembers feeling exposed that day, he remembers staring at every photo of the series intently making sure there was no evidence revealed of what he and Rey were doing in the photos.

"It's not like I told them the truth of the photos -

"You didn't need to! They already knew by just looking at them!"

"I'm sorry," Ben frowned. "I didn't know you felt that way. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you - it's just I got caught up in my own project. I won't do that again."

Kylo exhaled and sighed. "It doesn't matter," his voice went low as he settled down. "The photos are out. You can't take them back." His eyes locked on to his brother's. "I just want you to fix it."

"How?"

"Figure it out."

* * *

She hears a knock on her door.

"Rey," he calls out for her. Ben.

She lets him in naturally but to her surprise Kylo wasn't there. Her eyes scanned but he wasn't there. "Where's Kylo?"

"I asked him to give us some alone time - did you hear us?" he asked then.

"Yes - but not completely. What were you guys arguing about?"

"He's upset that you're hurt."

Her eyes widened. "Really?" she asked. She didn't expect him to be that concerned over her - to feel that way towards her. She associated Ben with feeling that way with her while she associated Kylo with feeling physical attachment.

Ben nodded. "He's also upset at me for not announcing our relationship yet."

"It's alright - we haven't been dating long." She meant it. She understood for they haven't been dating a long time.

"He's mainly upset over my gallery photos. I never seen him so upset before. I feel horrible for not listening to him."

"Is everything okay with you two?"

"Somewhat," Ben chuckled softly. "Rey."

"Yes?"

"Are you upset over the photos?"

Rey paused and thought about it. "No - I mean I was a little uncomfortable but I'm used to taking those types of pictures with him and I figured it was alright since nothing was exposed."

"I'm sorry I didn't ask how you felt either. I promise I'll consult the both of you from now on."

"I...I don't want to take photos like that for a while," she admitted in a low tone. She mainly kept quiet over Ben's decision to use the photos because she wanted him to be happy. But now the photos were affecting everything. Her image and their relationship.

Ben touched her head. "It's okay, Rey. I understand. Don't be afraid to tell me how you feel. You can always talk to me, you know that right?"

"I know. I just wanted to make you happy."

He gave her a small smile. "You're too sweet," he said as he kissed her.

She reciprocated the kiss. They kissed each other gently, back and forth. Taking turns with one another. It was innocent. It was tender. Until he lifted her on to the bed. She stopped kissing him then. "Should we get Kylo?"

Ben shook his head. "I want to spend alone time with you. He already knows." Ben wanted to make it up to her for putting her into this situation.

Rey nodded but stiffened in his hold.

"What's wrong?" he asked, immediately sensing a change in her.

"Nothing - it's just I'm a little scared and shy." She was used to sleeping with the both of them. But they haven't had sex one on one yet, until now.

Ben chuckled. "You've slept with me before."

"Not just us though."

"You already know that there will be some occasions where we would want to sleep with you separately."

"I know but just be gentle okay?" Rey was used to sleeping with the both of them. She was used to being comforted as the other entered her. She was comfortable with that arrangement.

Ben nodded and kissed her cheek. "I will. I'll be so gentle with you. I care about you so much, Rey."

"I know, Ben. I care about you too," she rasped as she felt him stroke her face. She felt ease at the sight of his face softening. Rey kissed him, locking him into a kiss as he went on top of her.

They kissed for a long time before having sex. His glasses leave a dent on her face but she didn't care. She liked being underneath him. She liked being held and loved. He knows that her whole life she craved to be held and kissed but never gotten it. He tends to that need of hers and fills the void. He cares, he adores her. He doesn't rush into having sex. Instead they take their time. They cuddled and kissed each other softly until Rey told him she was ready.

He's attentive.

Even though he looked over Rey and Kylo's feelings on the photos, it doesn't mean that he didn't care. Everyone made mistakes. No one was perfect.

"I'll promise to listen to you and Kylo from now on," he tells her, bringing her closer to the warmth of his chest. "I hope we're together for a long time."

"Me too."

* * *

When morning came, she is awaken by the vibrations of her phone. She reached for it and discovered that she had multiple notifications from Instagram. One notification was informing her that she had been tagged in a photo. Another was informing her that she was mentioned in a comment. And the other notifications were messages.

She clicked on the first notification, the tag.

She had her account set to be only tagged by people she followed.

With one click, it directed her to the photo - it was a photo of her and Ben. She smiled fondly as warmth spread across her body. It was one of their many selfies they took together. The one he posted was them making silly faces in one of many record stores. It was one of her favorite photos - their faces are pressed together side to side and they're stretching their mouths. She scrolled down and read the comment: I love this girl. Happy three months. Hope for more months to come.

"I figured it was time," Ben said as he and Kylo entered the room with breakfast. "Are you okay with that?"

She pulled the covers up higher, covering her naked body as she sat up. "Yeah," she said through excitement. "I'm more than okay."

Kylo stood there in silence, holding the tray of food as he watched Ben kiss her.

Rey pulled away the second she sensed something was off. "Are you okay, Kylo?"

"I'm fine," he assured her, placing the tray down. He shouldn't be jealous. He shouldn't.

"Come here," she pulled him into a kiss.

He kissed her naturally. He loved kissing her. He felt happy until the kiss was broken and was reminded that she was also Ben's.

"Kylo, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing."


	8. Denim Jacket

Chapter Seven: Denim Jacket

* * *

Kylo tries to be involved in the relationship.

Honestly he does.

But it's not exactly easy. With a busy schedule, it's difficult to find time with her. Especially on the days he did see her because his brother was also there. He loves his brother but his time with his girlfriend is split but not in equal halves. In fractures.

He does try to text in their group chat. Tries. It's very hard to have a conversation with her when she's having a deep conversation with Ben. The only thing Kylo could say was ask about her well being.

It wasn't until Ben publically announced his relationship with Rey that Kylo realized that Ben spends more time with her. Ben spends more time with her alone. One on one. Kylo couldn't recall any time he had spend time with her separately.

That's why he's a bit nervous that Ben's going to be away to Haiti for two months. Ben is going to photograph locals all around the country for a society magazine that's collaborating with UNICEF. Kylo's worried that he won't be able to entertain his girlfriend on his own or satisfy her. He's worried he'll bore her with their lack of conversations and lack of quality time together. But he'll finally get to have some time with her.

Kylo tells himself this as he tried to distract himself from his thoughts. He's in his room going through emails and listening to music as an attempt to drown out the sounds of a bed hitting against the wall. Ben was leaving to tomorrow morning and naturally wanted to have Rey the whole night by himself. Kylo doesn't blame him. In fact Kylo understands but the sounds were unbearable for they have a place in their hearts for just each other.

* * *

She misses him, Kylo knows. It's only a few days but she misses Ben, she misses him terribly. He hadn't seen her physically since the night before Ben left but Kylo could sense it by the group text. And that makes him feel worse because he can't muster up the courage to say something profound on their group text. The conversation feels as if it's meant for them - Rey and Ben and that Kylo was the one to monitor.

He reads the messages that are making his phone vibrate every few minutes.

 _Ben: I miss you_

 _Rey: I miss you too. But I'm happy and proud that you get to do this project._

Kylo couldn't help but to smirk. He couldn't help but to find it funny that people know Ben as a fashion photographer. But that's not true. Ben likes to dabble in all categories but his main passion is working with organizations to help spread awareness of poverty, war, animal extinction, and so on. Ben wants to be a journalist and go help countries that are in turmoil but that day is someday. Kylo wants Ben to be happy but is not ready to let his brother go out and put himself in danger. Kylo's heard horror stories of photographers and journalists being captured and tortured. That's reality of it, the risk of it all. So Kylo always make sure that Ben takes account to Kylo's worry over him. So hopefully that someday will never come and Ben finds a different way in helping the world.

This project Ben's doing - documenting the country and volunteering - hopefully it'll pacify his need of going away and joining organizations and help him find a safer alternative way in helping.

 _Rey: How's it like over there?_

 _Ben: It's so strange. Like you can see the actual lines of poverty areas and rich areas. There's more poverty than anything else - I can't explain. It's just there so much that needs to be done to help them. There's not enough of anything. Not enough food or shelter - not enough parents for children._

 _Rey: You can't help them all but you can help be a part of going in that direction._

 _Ben: I miss you so much. I'll promise to send you a package every week until I come back._

 _Rey: You don't have to_

 _Ben: Too late lol. There should be a package arriving this Friday for you._

 _Rey: Cheater :(_

 _Ben: Lol. I'm sorry. I like spoiling you Kitten. We'll video chat once a week too just like I promised. It'll be short but that's enough to get me by until I get to see you again._

 _Rey: If there's a time you can't I'll understand._

 _Ben: I want to talk to you more - but I have to go._

 _Rey: It's okay. Stay safe._

The conversation stops then.

Kylo held the phone close to his face and contemplated if he should say something. He feels that he couldn't - that there's no place for him to. He feels as if he'll be invading their privacy. But he hasn't spoken to her in the past few days since Ben had left. The only source of connection he has to her is through the messages, messages that he fails to talk to her.

Kylo threw his phone on his bed and cursed in the open, in the safety of his apartment.

He feels so useless. It's evident that the only way he sees her is through Ben. Ben was the glue to the three of them but since he's gone, it feels like Kylo has no place with her.

He screamed. Threw everything he could against the wall until the sounds of things breaking satisfied his fit of rage.

He stops then and exhaled several times, deep breaths. Deep frustrated saddened breaths. Then a thought occurs to him.

A thought that was so simple and yet was not conceived until now.

Kylo retrieved his phone and started typing. He decides to text her separately, no group text. Just him and her, making a place for the both of them.

 _Kylo: Hey. You okay?_

 _Rey: I'm fine._ She responded to him twenty minutes later. She was probably crying earlier that's why she was delayed, he sensed. She was probably crying for Ben the way he cried for her.

 _Kylo: You seemed really sad in the group message. I wanted to say something - is just hard._

 _Rey: I'm happy for him it's just I get depressed when people leave. I know he'll come back it's just it'll be such a long time until he gets back. I know I should be used to this but it's hard still._

His heart skipped a beat. He knows what she's implying. She feels like Ben had abandoned her. She never got out of the foster system happily. She never got a permanent family. She got attached to a lot of temporary foster parents but they never wanted her or had enough space. The only way Rey got out was by becoming too old for the system.

 _Kylo: I understand. I feel the same too._

 _Rey: Really?_

His lips curved into a smile. This was the most they've spoken to one another.

Kylo: _Yeah. Every time he goes away, I get depressed. That time he went away to Paris, Washington, New York - anywhere he goes away I get depressed. But I have to remind myself that he'll come back._

His message is left on read.

 _Kylo: Do you want to come over?_ He texted her five minutes later.

He waits for her to respond. He paces around instead of doing something productive.

 _Rey: Can you come over instead?_

He goes within seconds. He jumps into his car in haste and as he drove, he responded to her text. This was the first time she had invited him over to her home - hell the first time she invited either one of them. They've been so used to the arrangement of her going to their apartment that this excited him.

* * *

He knocks on her door and when the door opens, he is left stunned.

Her eyes are swollen and red. Her hair is wild and she was in her house clothes in the middle of the day - gray cotton shorts and a black tank top. She looks tired. She looks as if someone had broken her heart.

Rey attempted to smooth her hair then, sensing him examine her. "I'm sorry I'm not dressed up." She feels embarrassed then. She should have changed at least but she felt no need to since it was her apartment.

He shook her head at her. "It's alright," he says as he went inside. "Besides I don't like it when you dress up," he admitted in a low voice.

She turned at him. "What?" She couldn't help but to be in doubt. She dressed up all the time for them in the shared bedroom - short dresses, low cut shirts, lingerie. Kylo always responded well to that.

Kylo shrugged. It was the truth. He doesn't like it when she wore makeup or wore things that were considered fashionable like heels and skimpy clothes. "I don't like it when you dress up. You never look comfortable."

"How about when I dress up for you and Ben?"

Kylo bit his lip. "I don't like that either. It feels like you're a doll." That was an understatement. It felt like Kylo was fucking a pet whenever Ben requested her to wear certain things in bed and instructed her what to do. Hell there were many times, Ben instructed her to crawl around the apartment in lingerie. It made Kylo uncomfortable that he recently stopped calling her Kitten because it made him feel sick with himself. "Ben's the one that likes that," Kylo clarified to her, emphasizing every single word. "I never asked you to -I'm not saying you shouldn't - I'm fine if you like it."

"I don't like it either," she admitted to him. Blood rushed to her cheeks. She couldn't help but to be embarrassed about it. Hell she was even embarrassed about talking about it. "Sometimes it feels degrading what Ben requests me to do. I only do it because I thought both of you guys liked it."

"To be clear, I don't. If it seems like I do it's because I'm focusing on you. You shouldn't be doing things that make you uncomfortable to please anyone, he mumbled. His jaw twitched as he was reminded of Ben releasing intimate photos not too long ago.

"I know - it's just - I want to make you guys happy."

"Well how about you? You know you do have a say in what happens in the relationship."

Rey shrugged and wiped the residue of dried tears on her cheeks. "It's hard to say no to him. He's such a sweet guy - I hate letting him down."

Kylo's skin tightened as he realized something. Her constant need to please someone wasn't because of Ben but her past. She grew up wanting to be validated once in her life but no one ever gave her that. "Rey, saying how you feel doesn't let anyone down. Your thoughts have validation too."

"Do you like the way I look now? As I am?" she joked.

He cracks a small smile. "Yes I like your puffy eyes and runny nose." He says as he sat her down on the couch and wiped her nose with his sleeve.

"That's your favorite shirt," she pulled away.

Kylo shrugged. "It's just a shirt. And whatever you wear doesn't matter as long as you're comfortable." He pulled her closer to clean her face. Once he was done, he leaned to kiss her but she pulled away.

"How can you possibly want to kiss me like this? I'm a mess. I've been lying in bed all day - I didn't even shower yet. I'm disgusting right now."

He cupped her by the chin and gave her a light kiss on her nose. "Yes you are but you're still my disgusting mess," he teases lovingly. He wants to make her laugh, wants the evidence of her sadness to fade away.

"If I wasn't a model, you wouldn't be dating me."

Kylo scoffed playfully. "You haven't been modeling a year yet, are you even considered one? Are you even qualified?"

Rey rolled her eyes and shook about as Kylo wrapped his arms to pull her close to him. She knows he's only teasing but she's not used to it - him joking with her. It's catching her off guard. She used to his seriousness, his stoic façade. Him teasing her was making her blood boil. "You know what I mean. If I wasn't all dressed up and caught you and Ben's attention, we wouldn't have been together."

"No. If I didn't get to know you, we wouldn't have been together."

"How about our first shoot?" she asks him then. Her eyebrows furrowed. She was skeptical to his words. "It wasn't as my personality caught your attention between those few hours of us being silent. You were attracted by the way I looked."

Kylo held her tighter as she moved about to be freed. He hadn't hold her this much before that he doesn't want to let go. "If you recalled I wasn't interested in you at all," he clarified. "You were just any other model I had to work with."

Rey scoffed. "Oh really?" she laughed at him mockingly. "Funny. So entertain me then. What made you become interested in me?" she pulled on his hair.

He blinked. She had never done that before. Tease him. He rest his chin on her head in response. "You were nervous and that intrigued me. You didn't look at me in admiration. You looked at me in fear. You afraid of me even though you knew who I was."

"You think so highly of yourself," she laughed.

"Stop. No more teasing," he hugs her tighter, keeping his chin firmly on top of her head. "Or I won't tell you the rest."

"Sorry, please go on," she says mockingly.

Kylo smirked. "The whole shoot you were so nervous - I can't explain but it made me see the type of person you were. You were new to this. You didn't seem to belong and that interested me because you were just any normal girl."

"So are you saying I'm basic or something?" she broke out in laughter.

"No," he laughed. "You were different. I never met anyone like you." The models he had worked with in his life, he found them generic. Cookie cutter. They were all beautiful but they all alike. No substance in them.

"You never called me though after that day."

"I told you I wanted to."

"Kylo," she gathers control to face him. His arms rest on her then instead of asserting control with her. "Be honest with me. Why didn't you call me? I texted you and yet you never said anything."

"I'm not good with words, you know that Rey."

"I know but there's more to the story. I know there is."

"When you said you weren't ready I realized you were young. You barely got to live and you were so naïve. I didn't want to mess you up."

"We're in a relationship now -

"Can you blame me? You were always there. I couldn't help it."

* * *

It didn't occur to Kylo how much he didn't know about his girlfriend until Ben was away. Like how feisty she was. Or how quick tempered she was. Or that her eating habits were like his.

She loves junk food. She likes instant noodles and tacos and dumping hot sauce into pretty much anything. It makes sense though since food wasn't a luxury for her. The food that was available to her growing up was cheap fast food or frozen TV dinners. She makes money now and is able to afford better food but she has a fondness for her childhood food. He doesn't know how much of a homebody she was until Ben's gone. Since Ben's gone, he expected Rey to miss going out on dates but it's two weeks in and she hadn't once expressed she missed it.

He comes over twice week and they will spend a majority curled up watching youtube videos or adding extra concoctions to their instant or takeout or doing activities together like puzzles and model building. She's been really into model kits and it isn't until they were playing his old game stations that he realized how much she knew about them.

His Gameboy hadn't been working since he was young until she requested him to bring it over so she could fix it.

He watched her in interest tear it apart and put it back together within minutes. It looked like she knew what she was doing - as if she had done this a million times.

"There," she says, handling back to him. "It should work now."

He turns it on and it works just as new when it first came out. "I didn't know you were a builder or whatever you call it," he commented.

Rey smiled with pride. She couldn't help but to feel bubbly. He seemed very impressed "Toys weren't exactly a luxury at foster homes. The kids and I would share whatever hand me downs that were donated. So we had to be extra careful with them. Most things that were donated were close to broken but I learned how to fix them." Game stations always attracted her. They were shiny and intricate compared to the worn out dolls in the donation boxes.

"You can probably fix my old Walkman, huh?"

"Isn't that thing before your time?" she laughed.

"Yeah but my dad gave it to me so I thought it was cool."

Rey laughed. "Next time you come over bring it by and I'll fix it- probably next Monday. This weekend I have a shoot."

"Do you always want to be a model growing up?" he asked then.

"No. You already know I'm doing it until I have enough money saved for college."

"I know but since we've been together you haven't discussed what you really want to do."

"It's because I really don't know what I want to do yet. I kind of want to go into engineering but I also want to go into social work."

"Well you'll figure it when you do go to college."

"How about you?"

Kylo placed the Gameboy down. "What about me?"

"Did you ever wanted to do something else besides modeling?"

"Yeah. I wanted to do a lot of things. I wanted to go into computer programming or video game design but it was hard for me to go to college."

"That explains why you're always on your phone. But why?"

"I'm well known, Rey. I tried going to college but ended up dropping out before my semester ended. It was hard. Everyone knew who I was. I was constantly followed by admirers and paparazzi and I was bullied. "

"Well it's been ten years. Maybe people will be more understanding."

"I feel like I'm too old for college."

Rey laughed. "They're people in their sixties going back for a degree. Well how about this. Would you want to go back to college with me when I do go?"

He thought for a moment. That's a nice thought. "I feel like we'll get a lot of attention doing that. I feel that wouldn't be a good idea."

"But we'll have each other."

Kylo liked that arrangement and nodded. "I like that and I'm happy you actually do plan to go to college. Modeling is not exactly the career I want you to have." He doesn't like the idea of Rey being a model forever like him. He doesn't like the idea of Rey constantly monitoring her weight and try to be the image the industry wants. Even though she ate unhealthily, she worked out a lot and made sure she had one meal a day that had some form of nutrition. He doesn't want her to feel insecure about herself when she does age and has trouble finding work against younger models. He doesn't want her to deal with corrupted companies trying to make advances on her or blackmail her for sexual favors for work. He doesn't like the idea of her being half naked or have her be caught up with the image the media has painted of her. He doesn't want her to go through the things he had went through over the years. "Promise me that you'll go to college."

"I will. Don't worry. But how about you? Were you always planning to model forever?"

"No. I was planning to model until no one wanted me and when that time came I would have enough saved to last me for the rest of my life."

"That's not living."

"Neither is modeling to survive."

* * *

Rey likes that she's spending more time with her boyfriend Kylo. She likes having him opening up to her. She likes that he teases her and messes with her. She likes that they fight sometimes over stupid things like how she let her clothes in a hamper instead of folding them and hanging or that he's a clean freak and gets bothered that she doesn't wash the dishes right away.

She likes that they are talking more and that the awkward silences were becoming obsolete with them.

But it doesn't mean that she doesn't miss Ben. She misses Ben still, misses him like crazy. She doesn't talk to Kylo about it though. She doesn't want him to think she doesn't care about him. She doesn't want him to think that she cares about Ben more.

And so she doesn't talk about it with Kylo.

But Kylo knows. He could tell by the messages of the group text he had abandoned. He reads the messages at the end of every day. He isn't hurt for this was natural. Rey would naturally miss Ben. He was her other boyfriend. There was a particular message that catches Kylo's interest.

 _Rey: I miss you. I wish we could video chat longer than ten minutes but I know you're busy. I don't expect you to make more time - I just want to let you know that I do understand and I'm happy for you. I just want to let you know how much I care for you. I miss you holding me. I miss your scent on my clothes._

He puts his phone in his pocket then and decides to do something. He decides to get her gift, to get her a package as well to ease her loneliness.

The next time he does see her, he gives her the gift.

"What's this?" she asks him.

"It's a gift from me. I wanted to get you something," he said stiffly as his cheeks reddened. She looked at him in a disheveled state as if he was some intruder.

Her eyes lit up to his surprise. "Thank you. That's so sweet of you," she went on her toes to kiss his cheek. "Can I open it now?"

"In front of me?" he blinked several times.

She nodded. "Can I?"

Kylo bit his lip and stiffened even more. He's not comfortable with people opening presents in front of him. But he decides to make an exception. "Sure."

She opens the package in her living room. It was a simple package. It was in a beige box wrapped in blue colored ribbon. He wanted to have it wrapped nicely but couldn't find any store that would do it for him since Christmas was far away.

Rey opens the box carefully, withholding her enthusiasm. She can sense Kylo was embarrassed by the way he stood. She gently pulled the tissue paper out, layer by layer and found several items inside. She lifted the second to smallest thing and opened the package. She held it and stared at it for a long time. "Is this? Is this?" she asked unable to speak clearly.

He nodded. "I remember you said you always wanted the originally Polly Pokcet toy when you were a kid." He had gotten her the original one, or one of the originals. It was a small, pastel blue heart shaped compact with flower embellishments all around the brand name Polly Pocket. He watched quietly as she opened the box to find the interior/playset of a dollhouse and Polly Pocket along with other little accessories. "Some parts move, like the dog and the chair." He gently opened the side compartments to reveal more to the little portable handsized doll house.

"Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me." She gave him a firm hug. She carefully closed the toy back and looked at the other items he had gotten her. The second him she pulled out was the largest item, it was a blue denim jacket. "Is this Ben's?" she asked the second she recognized the scent.

He nodded. "I read your messages with him. You said you missed his smell and this is the most recent thing he wore before he left. I'm pretty sure he won't mind that you borrow it until he comes back."

She gave him another hug. He couldn't help but to break in a smile. The last item was the smallest. It was a folded sheet of paper. She unfolded it and found a sentence in Kylo's hand writing: _I owe you one phone call._ "So does that mean you'll call me anytime I want you to?"

"It's a one time transaction," he smirked. "After that we go back to never calling and texting only when we want to see each other. No texting periodically throughout the day."

Rey pretended to sigh. "Fine." She kissed him then, kisses his cheek. "Thank you so much. This means so much to me."

"You're welcome. Rey."

"Yes?" she pulled away.

Kylo cleared his throat and tried to seem relaxed but he wasn't. He was tense. Uncomfortable again.

"What is it?"

Kylo blinked several times. "Rey...Rey-I-I lo-

The door knocked then.

"One second," she said. She went to answer the door but instead found a package. A package from Ben. She placed the package on the table. "You were saying?" she asks given him her full attention.

Kylo sighed. He wants to tell her how he feels about her, that loves her but he knows that she's been waiting for Ben package for her the whole week. This was important to her so he decides to wait another time. "I'll tell you later. Go open your package," he encourages her.

"Are you sure?"

He nodded firmly. "Yeah. Go ahead."

She takes him by the hand and squeezes it, leading him to the table. Rey has him sit down so she could sit on his lap as she opened the box. He allows her and keeps their hands intertwined.

Inside the box was perfume, a lace choker with a little gold heart, and a lacy lingerie.


	9. Leather Jacket

Chapter Eight: Leather Jacket

* * *

Inside the box was perfume, a lace choker with a little gold heart, and a lacy lingerie.

Kylo's mood changed within seconds. "What the hell," he bit the words out as his blood was boiling by the second. He swung at the box, making it collapse onto the floor. "You're not going to wear that," he tells her through his angered state. But it doesn't come out as an order or demand, it comes out as a reminder.

"I didn't plan to," she said, squeezing his hand, holding him in place.

"You have to tell him how you feel about it."

"I will," she nodded. "Hey, relax,'" she says as he moved about. "Come on."

"How am I supposed to relax?"

"I'll talk to him tomorrow when I video chat with him," she assured.

"Rey, how do you feel about it? The things he had gotten you. Why aren't you upset?"

"I'm just surprised," she said then, calmly. "This isn't like him. He usually gets me nice little things like candy or snacks or zines or stationery."

"All the gifts he's been giving you are all fucking crap," Kylo mumbled. "He doesn't give you things he thinks you like. He doesn't take the time to give you meaningful things. He gives you whatever. Come on Rey you must have expected this."

Rey went silent. She remained on his lap, her hand firmly interlocked in his.

"Rey," Kylo's voice went low then. "Say something."

She turned to him, turned to face him. He keeps her hand in his. "I'm sorry I haven't been giving you enough attention."

"I didn't say that -

"You don't have to. I should have noticed the signs I'm sorry. Kylo," she says his name in the open.

"Yes?"

"What do you want in our relationship?"

"I just want you to be happy."

* * *

The second Ben made their relationship public, the world went crazy. Rey was bombarded with texts from her manager Carrie, the few friends she kept in contact from all the foster homes she's been in, Finn, Poe, Rose - everyone. It was quite overwhelming, being constantly asked how Ben was like in real life and if he treated her well. Carrie periodically checks up on her and asks about Ben from time to time. Rey doesn't mind, it was nice to know that she had people looking after her.

Next Day:

"It's like a fairytale," Finn gushed as he poured coffee in each of their cups. "Foster kid turned model is dating one of the most famous photographers ever."

Rose scrunched up her nose. "You make it sound so cheesy."

Poe and Rey chuckled in the background. They were in Finn and Poe's apartment. Relaxing. Having a nice talk over lunch and coffee. Finn had made his famous casserole and it had felt like years since Rey had seen her friends.

"What's he like?" Rose asks as she blew her coffee. "You have yet to bring him over to our hangouts."

Rey sat up in her chair and focused on Poe's pet BB the Eight. BB for short. Poe was holding his beloved cat close to his chest, stroking him lovingly. The sight caused her skin to tighten as she watched Poe tighten BB's collar. "He's a great guy," Rey said.

Rose raised her eyebrow. Her response sounded hallow. "Does he treat you right?" Rose watch Rey fix herself in her chair and swallow.

"Yeah. He does."

Rose forced herself to nod. "I see."

Poe looked up from his cat and locked his eyes on Rose. "Rey's just sad that's all. She misses her boyfriend, Rose. You can stop the interrogation."

She shrugged nonchalantly. Frankly, Rose still couldn't picture Rey with a photographer. She always pictured Rey with a guy that's an engineer or a programmer. "There's nothing wrong with being careful. So how have you've been holding up since he's gone?"

"I've been keeping busy. You know work and -

"Watching youtube videos and fixing anything that's broken," Finn teased.

Rey laughed. "You know me so well."

"Hey I'm not complaining! If it wasn't for you I would have had to buy another phone!" Finn laughed. "I still can't believe how much of a saint you are. You fixed my cracked screen for free."

Rey couldn't help but to feel pride. "It's nothing."

"Once you save up for college, you should really think of going in my major," Rose suggested. "You love fixing things as much as I do."

"We'll see. I don't know I keep jumping back and forth with social work though. I don't want any other kid to have the system let them down," Rey bit her lip. Rose was one of Rey's closest friends. They met two years ago at work. They used to work as mechanics together until Rey was discovered by her manager.

"Well whatever choice you make, you're going to change the world," Poe gave her an encouraging smile. "Hey kitty - stop that," he said in a firm tone to BB-8. BB-8 was scratching Poe, attempting to get the collar off. "Kitten stop."

Rey couldn't help but to turn her head at Poe out of habit of hearing the word kitten. She blushed but none of them noticed. Instead they were talking about setting aside another day to go hiking. She tries to join in the conversation but she couldn't. She was frozen, in disbelief that she thought Poe was calling her.

"Rey, are you alright?" Rose asked. She's the one to finally notice something was off with her friend of two years.

"I'm fine - I think I should be going."

Finn frowned. "You barely ate your food, Peanut."

"I'm not feeling well."

"Rey," Rose calls out.

"Yes?"

"You know you can always talk to us, right?"

She nodded. "I know."

* * *

Rey texts Ben the second she came back home from spending time with her friends: _Hey. I'm home._

 _Ben: Weren't you supposed to be out with your friends?_

 _Rey: I was but it was just a short hang out._

 _Ben: Oh okay. Do you want to video chat early then?_

 _Rey: Yeah. I'd like that._

Immediately Rey went to get her laptop. As she waited for it to turn on and load up, she sat down on her couch and hugged her legs. She bit her fingernails as she waited, bit them nervously. She wasn't wearing the things Ben had gotten her but was wearing her favorite sweats and her favorite shirt. It was a men's t-shirt and she had it since she was twelve years old. It was a donated shirt and none of the boys wanted it and so she decided to keep it. She loved that shirt, it was nice and warm and soft at the collar. It was oversized on her and it was faded earthy green with faded words on it. It was so faded and she had it for so long that she had forgotten what the words were.

Her hair was in a messy bun and she was already working on her other hand.

She waits for Ben to call her on Skype. Waits in anticipation for the sound of ringing.

When it does ring, she sat up straighter and tried to make herself presentable.

She accepts the call and waits for the screen to adjust. "Hey," she said with gleaming eyes. The sight of him always made her softened. She missed his shaggy hair and beard. She misses his glasses pressed on her skin.

"Hey - you're not wearing what I got you."

Rey shrugged indifferently. "I didn't feel like wearing it."

"Rey I got you those things."

She shifted. She can feel his disappointment. "I know and I'm grateful that you did. But I don't want to wear it," she says without hesitation.

"Please?"

She shook her head.

"I miss you Rey. Please it'll cheer me up."

"I don't feel comfortable wearing it or anything like that. It makes me remember of one of the creepy foster parents I had that tried to get me to dress less and walk in on me in the bathroom."

"I'm sorry that happened to you."

Rey hugged her legs tighter. He didn't sound sincere. He sounded disappointed in her. "But?"

"Rey I just miss you. I miss you so much. I miss having you."

"You have me now."

"Rey," his tone is stern. He sounded like Poe scolding BB.

Her heart skipped a beat. "We talk to each other every day," she began, changing the subject. "We video chat once a week -

"Rey. You know what I mean. I miss having you physically next to me -

"No you miss having me under you."

"It's natural for couples to miss that. Especially if one's far away from the other. It's not fair since Kylo's keeping you company while I'm gone and you don't want to do anything for me."

Rey raised her eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?" she snapped.

"You have to compromise, Rey."

"Kylo and I haven't been sleeping with each other since you've left!"

Ben remained calm.

Ugh. It was driving her crazy. She hated it how he's able to stay so calm during arguments - no wonder why Kylo got so mad at Ben all the time. It was infuriating. It was as if he was treating her like a child. "I'm not lying!" she shouted. "Why would I lie about something like that?"

"Come on now, Rey. You don't have to lie. It's expected for you two since he is also your boyfriend. It's unfair that he has you for himself."

"Him and I haven't slept together." That was the truth. Yes they've been spending more time but the haven't slept together. They don't feel the need to right now. They were doing just fine spending time together. Talking. Laughing. "And even if we did, why would it make a difference?"

"Yes it does. He's taking my place -

"He's not replacing you! Ben he loves you! This whole time he's been considerate. He's been there whenever I missed you -

"The Rey before I left would have done this gesture for me. Ever since I left, he's changed you -

"No he hasn't. I'm still the same. I'm me. I'm still the same person."

Ben shook his head. "You let yourself go. You look so depressed."

"Can I be depressed sometimes?"

"Kitten -

"Don't call me that."

Ben blinked. He stunned. No girl had ever spoke out to him like that before.

"I don't want you to call me that."

"Why? It's my nickname for you."

"I don't like being called that. Do I always have to give you an explanation?"

"You're just upset, Kitten."

"Stop!" she shouted. "Stop calling me that! Stop telling me how I feel."

"He's changed you. You're acting just like him - like a kid throwing a tantrum."

"So what if I am?" she mumbled. She felt as if he was belittling her, making her feel small. "I don't care. I don't want to wear the thing you got me. You should be able to understand that."

"You were fine with it before."

"Well I'm not fine now. And that's the difference. I was fine with it before but I'm not."

"Rey, you're crying."

"I'm not -

She felt tears streaming down her face.

"Rey," his voice went soft. "Rey -

She shut the laptop down, ending the conversation.

Her phone started to vibrate. It was vibrating wildly. It sounded as if her phone was a ticking bomb.

 _Ben: Rey. Talk to me._

 _Ben: Rey, please I don't want you to cry._

 _Ben: I'm sorry._

 _Ben: Please answer me._

 _Ben: I love you so much Rey._

She put her phone underneath the cushions of her couch and went to her room. She buried herself underneath her covers and sobbed. She doesn't want to respond. She doesn't want to hear the vibrations. She just wanted to cry.+

* * *

Kylo doesn't know why Rey and Ben still text each other on the group text but he's glad just this once. Just tonight. The messages swarm his phone.

 _Ben: Rey. Talk to me._

 _Ben: Rey, please I don't want you to cry._

 _Ben: I'm sorry._

 _Ben: Please answer me._

 _Ben: I promise I won't ask you to things like that anymore_

 _Ben: I'll treat you better. I promise._

 _Ben: You mean so much to me._

She was crying.

Kylo immediately called her but she doesn't respond. He calls her again but his call goes to voice mail.

"Kylo?" the interviewer called out for him. "What's wrong?"

"Sorry - I have to go." He gathered the rest of his things. "We'll do this another time - something came up."

He jumps into his car and called Ben. "Come on. Pick up you bastard," he growled.

No response.

Kylo called again.

And again.

But nothing. Ben was probably too busy trying to call Rey.

Kylo cursed and tried to do the same.

Nothing.

He exhaled and forced himself to focus on getting there safely. He was two hours away. The only thing he could do was to relax and get there in one piece.

If he could he would stop on the side on the rode and text Ben and give him a piece of his mind but that would only waste time. Kylo wanted to see Rey. He wanted to be there. He doesn't want her to be alone. Kylo hit the side of his steering wheel. He should have sensed something was off when she texted Ben that she came home early. Rey was supposed to be out longer.

He should have known something was off.

* * *

After she calmed herself down, she forces herself to retrieve her phone. She swiped her phone and skimmed through her notifications. Texts. Missed calls. All from Ben. She kept scrolling down - all she could see was missed calls from Ben. She took a deep breath. Maybe she should call him. He had been calling and texting her.

She was about to press call but she stopped herself. She needed some time alone. She needed to be alone with her thoughts.

She needs time for herself. She needed time to breathe - to be that girl she used to be before this. Before them. She used to be fine being on her own and now she was crying? The child her would have never wanted that. The child her wanted her to make a difference in this world, to take a stand and stop being weak. She should stop crying.

Rey felt her body shaking. She took deeper breaths, deeper slower breaths. Rey. Relax. Rey. Relax.

She paced around her apartment, turns on the TV to some sitcom in order to be surrounded by sound. Rey, she told herself. You can do this. You can relax. You've done this before. You've done this your whole life. You don't need anyone to be there -

Rey stopped and picked up the Polly Pocket compact from the top of her dresser. She held it in her hand and opened it, marveling at the little details of the little portable doll house. Her heart beat started to slow down. She always wanted one growing up. She had a foster parent, Ms. Sanders who collected them and stored them in a glass case. Little Rey didn't know better and picked at the lock and was beaten and sent off to another home.

She closed the compact and squeezed the plastic toy in her hand. A plastic toy shouldn't mean this much to her. It shouldn't but it did. Because someone gave it to her. Someone actually took the time to listen to what she had to say. No one had ever done that for her. Not any of her close friends growing up. Not Rose. Not Finn. Not Poe. Not even Carrie, the one that gave her a new life in modeling.

Rey puts it back on top of her dresser.

She goes back to her living room and picks up her phone and calls him. She calls the one that gave her the sweetest present she had ever received.

"Hi," she breathed.

"Hey."

Rey blinked. He actually picked up. He actually picked up like he promised her.

"Rey. Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry for bothering you," she said immediately. "You're probably at a party talking to companies and -

"It's fine Rey," he laughs.

"Really?"

"Yeah. You know I hate forced events. Are you at home?"

"Yeah - I was wondering - if you can come over," she blurted. Rey cursed underneath her breath. She didn't know what came over her.

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

"If you can't - it's fine -

"No, it's not a problem."

"No I don't know why I said it. I'm not thinking clearly- you're two hours away - you shouldn't -

"Rey I want to. I'm on my way now."

"Kylo -

There was knock on her door.

Rey raised her eyebrow. She clutched on to her phone and kept it close to her ear.

"Rey I'm in front of your house."

She laughed. "No you're not."

Kylo laughed. "Yes I am."

She blinked. He sounded as if he was out of breath.

"Please let me in. It's cold."

Rey kept the phone on her ear and looked through the peephole of her door. Rey moved back. She was startled. This couldn't be real. This - this had to be a dream. She must be dreaming -

"Rey, I can see you. Please open the door."

She slowly unlocked the door. "You're here," she blinked, her phone still at her ear. She stared at him. His phone was away and he was standing there, towering her. He was dressed in his leather jacket, the leather jacket he wore on the first shoot they had together.

"I said I was," he said almost quietly.

She blinked again. "How - how did you know that I wanted you here?"

"I saw your messages with Ben. I called you earlier but you didn't respond."

"I looked through my notifications. I didn't see it."

"You probably didn't go through all of them. Ben must have called you a thousand times. Are you alright?"

Rey put her phone down and wiped her eyes. She had stopped crying some time ago but her eyes were swollen. "I'm fine - I just wanted some time alone."

"What do you want right now?"

Her eyes flickered. It reminds her of her first time. Her first time was with him and it wasn't their doing. Kylo didn't want to engage in anything unless he felt she wanted to. But Ben worked things in his favor. Planned it. Rey stood there and wondered if Kylo would have waited longer. She stared at him, stared at his dark eyes and mouth. He always look sad. He doesn't smile much. But she can see him as he was. He may have been a wild child in his youth, may have been every truth to every rumor but he's not that anymore. He's older. He's grown up. He's matured. He wasn't going to hurt her. And from that moment, she no longer felt afraid of him. "I want you to hold me."

He holds her without a word. Lifts her in and locks the door. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her face on the crook of his neck. The leather is pressed against her skin. It's slick while her skin was oily, sticking on to her.

"Where do you want to go?"

"My room. Can you just hold me?"

She can feel him nod.

"I don't want you to go. Can you stay the night? I want you to hold me."

He doesn't say a word. He takes her, lays her down but keeps her in his arms. It occurs to her then that they haven't slept together alone like the way she did with ben. She hadn't noticed it but he hadn't talked about it either. But that soothes her, because it lets her know that it doesn't bother him. That he wants it to happen when she wants it to.

"Am I hurting you?" he asks.

She laughed into his hand. "No."

"You're so small. I feel like I'm going to crush you."

"I may be small but I'm stronger than I look." She smells him, smells his scent. It's different. It's muskier - she couldn't quite explain. It was hard with the leather jacket to pinpoint his scent. "Can you take off your jacket?" she asked. "I want to smell it. I know I'm weird."

"Yes you are," but he does so. He breaks them apart for a second to give it to her.

Rey held it close to her nose and smelled it as his strong arms wrap around her. In any other situation Kylo would have find this odd but he didn't. She was being consoled by his scent as he held her. She wanted to have a place with her, just him. As he is.

"What do I smell like to you?" he asked in an amused tone.

"Like the sea and sweat. Like leather."

He smirked. "You're weird smelling my sweaty jacket."

She stuck her tongue at him. "I don't care. Kylo I'm sorry you missed your interview because of me."

"It's alright. I didn't want you to go another day sad and alone."

"The interview was important and the party too. You could have gotten to get more jobs -

"You're more important."


	10. Contracts

**A/N IM SO SORRY I JUST REALIZED I FORGOT TO POST THIS**

Ben Solo and Kylo Solo.

Sons of Leia Organa, senator and sons of Han Solo, actor turned pilot. And Luke, uncle and father figure/lover of Han Solo.

The boys never had a chance in having a normal upbringing. Even before they were born. The marriage between Leia and Han was controversial due to their stark contrast of status. Han Solo, teen heartthrob actor retires, leaves the whole acting world behind for her, a young bright girl who would someday follow her father's place in politics. Before she was a senator, she was just a Harvard student working on finishing up her degree in law.

The boys were constantly under cameras from the moment they were visible in their mother's womb.

Their mother did all means necessary to keep them shielded from the cameras. She limited their time from the public world, sent them to private schools with tight security, and made sure the walls that surrounded her house was high and sturdy. The boys didn't notice much on how protected they were. Leia made sure of it by providing vast lots of space in the mansion along with activities and such.

Their father on the other hand was lenient, the complete opposite. He wasn't as cautious as her and took his boys wherever he pleased: amusement parks, zoos, hell even in his vast collection of planes and jets.

Ben and Kylo's fondest memories were whenever their dad would take them in his jet and fly them anywhere they pleased. Ben's favorite memory was when their dad flew them to New York to get pizza. Kylo's favorite memory was when their dad let him fly the jet when he was ten years old.

However that memory was Leia's least favorite. It haunted her to this day whenever she remembered it - of caught footage of Kylo flying the jet while Han was in the passenger seat drinking whiskey in a flask. It became news and her boys were taken away under custody until both Leia and Han were cleared and completed courses.

 _"I can't believe you let Kylo fly the jet! He's only ten years old -_

 _"He's fine. He's a natural," Han said feebly, trying to walk around Leia's temper. "Nothing happened. I was there."_

 _"Han there's videos of it," she snapped. She could barely breathe. "How can you be so stupid?"_

 _"It's not much of a scandal. Everyone's overreacting. They're acting as if he crashed into a building. I just let him fly a bit - just five minutes and I was there. Everything was under control -_

 _"I just got my position in the House," she bit every word out. "What if they make me resign because of this?"_

 _"Leia. I'm sorry I didn't put that to account -_

 _Leia covered her mouth with her hand. "What if they take our boys away?" she asked quietly. The thought didn't occur to her until now - that they could lose their boys._

 _Han went pale and cursed underneath his breath. How could he be so careless? "They're not - I'm not going to let them" he shook his head several times. "Leia this will all clear out."_

Leia and Han didn't get their custody of their boys until six months later after the videos and photos leaked. Even when they did get their boys back, nothing was ever the same between them. The times where they loved each other like young love was becoming less frequent as the years went by.

* * *

The boys' childhood was far too complicated for any one of them to try to piece it in order. Their parents were always on and off. Some days they'll be in love and other days they couldn't stand the sight of one another. Whenever Han would go away for space, that's when their Uncle Luke came. Uncle Luke would come and pick up the broken pieces and make the boys whole. He would take them to soccer practice and pick them up from school whenever Han went away and he would even take them to their shoots.

Ben and Kylo have been modeling since they were four months old. It wasn't their mother's idea, that was a given. Han wanted them to model because he was proud of his boys and wanted them to be shown off to the world. Leia was against having her sons being out in display but over time she warmed up to the idea. Her boys were handsome and from her twins' birth, companies wanted her boys to be the faces of their brandings. She allowed Ben and Kylo to model for she figured it'll teach her boys how to manage money and negotiate with companies. Naturally she kept seventy five percent of her sons' earnings and set aside for when they were adults and the rest, she allowed them to have spending money. She made them keep a log of their spending since they were six years old and they had to ask for permission of what they can spend their money on until they were fifteen.

Kylo can't even think about a childhood memory without remembering three other memories. Everything about it was a blur, a train wreck. He feels schizophrenic thinking about it.

"When did you stop liking modeling?" Rey asked as she clutched on to his jacket.

He pulled her closer to him, wrapping her in place. He blinked and thought about it. "What do you mean?"

"Like when did you start hating it?" she asked. She remembers it, the first time they had met - how moody he was. How irritable and short tempered he was.

He bit his lip and thought about it. "I don't think I ever liked it," he admitted.

"Really?"

Kylo nodded as his eyes lowered. "Yeah. I grew up to it. I didn't think much of it - I thought it was just a normal thing."

"You never wanted to stop modeling?"

"Well Ben wanted to -

"I'm asking you."

He held her tighter. That pleased him. That she was asking a question directly for him. Just him and not him in a matching set. Or in a pair. His whole life before Ben stopped modeling was being constantly referred to as a set, the twins. "Of course there were times when I was a kid and I got irritable and didn't want to smile. But my dad or Uncle Luke always convinced me to. Growing up...it wasn't a choice for us. We just did what everyone told us to - _I_ wasn't given a choice," he corrected, forcing himself to speak about himself and only about himself.

"I still can't believe your mom allowed you guys to be child models."

Kylo chuckled but it was hallow. That was one of many frequently asked questions he had gotten growing up whenever he did an interview. "Well my mom was always working. She was the bread winner. She wasn't really around either. She saw our dad taking us to shoots and auditions as a form of bonding and so she was okay with it - I guess I started really hating it when I was in my teens."

"No pinpoint age?"

"No. It was a slow build up. I really hated it in my teens especially when I hit puberty and companies wanted me to look identical to Ben."

Rey laughed. "But you're twins."

"But we're different. We were experiencing puberty differently and yet the companies wanted us to be carbon copies. We used to work for a fashion company and had to monitor our muscle mass and weight and facial hair. We were under contract and had to work for them until we were twenty or supposed to until we broke our contract. We hated what the company was doing to us especially making us do so many publicity stunts." He exhaled and chewed on the inner part of his cheek. "I -

His phone rang.

It wasn't in his pocket. It was on top of Rey's dresser.

His skin tightened from the sound. It echoed against the wood of the dresser, echoed as if it was an alarm. A ticking bomb. Tick. Tick...Tick.

"You should answer it," her voice went low. Rey brought Kylo's jacket closer to her.

He knew who was calling him at this hour of the night. "I know who it is."

"I do too," she answered, using all her will to make herself sound composed.

"I don't have to answer it," he tells her. Assures her. "I can always call him tomorrow. Would you want that?"

It took a while for Rey to respond. When she did, it was delayed. In a stiffened nod.

Kylo stroked her cheek. "It's alright. You don't have to feel bad for not always answering on time."

"I'm assuming you're speaking from experience?" she asked cheekily.

* * *

When he woke up, he makes sure not to wake her. He unfolds himself from her and takes his phone and himself into her living room.

Kylo scratched his head and yawned as he waited for his phone to load up all the notifications from Ben. There was a time difference between them but he knows that Ben didn't sleep at all and was wide awake regardless. Kylo dialed up his brother and took several breaths in anticipation for what will come.

In three rings, Ben picks up and speaks in a frenzy. "Kylo - Rey - do you know if she-

"She's fine," Kylo responded indifferently, keeping his tone even.

"Rey and I had a fight yesterday," Ben sounded distressed. Guilty. Sad. Hurt. "I tried calling her and trying to make things right but she didn't respond."

Shit. Here it goes. Kylo took a deep breath and prepared himself for hell. "She's alright now. I stayed over last night."

Silence.

Kylo clutched onto his cellphone.

"Why didn't you tell me? I called you and texted you last night," Ben asked in that frightening placid tone that he hated.

"I'm sorry - I should have but -

"You made me worried sick the whole night," Ben's voice was hard.

"I'm sorry -

"I thought something bad had happened to her," Ben's voice went louder, slicing every word Kylo had to say. "I thought she was out at place she shouldn't be -

"Ben, please listen to -

"Don't interrupt me," Ben warned, returning his voice into that frightening placid state.

He hushes up in a second.

"Kylo, you have to inform me in on important things especially at a time like last night. Rey is also my girlfriend. You have to put my feelings in consideration."

What? "She didn't want to talk to you. She needed some time alone. She needed me," Kylo spat out. "What else could I do?"

"You could have texted me that."

"I know, I feel shitty for not doing it - it just -

"You didn't want to ruin the mood?" Ben's words are like venom. Spiteful. Low.

"Didn't you fucking hear what I just said to you?" Kylo snapped back. "I was busy being there for her - trying to fix the fucking mess you made! How can you think of me like that? You think I wanted you to be worried the whole night? You think I'm only here to be your fucking little replacement? A babysitter?"

"I didn't say any of that."

"You don't have to."

"Put Rey on the phone for me," Ben says, glossing it over. "I don't have much time. I have to be head over to the organization in twenty minutes. I want to apologize to her."

"How about me?"

"What about you? You should be the one apologizing for failing to think of your brother's feelings."

Kylo hung up on him then.

"Was that Ben?" Rey asked as she entered the room.

"Yeah. It was," Kylo said through gritted teeth.

Rey swallowed hard. "I'm assuming by the fumes you're releasing in the air that it didn't go well."

"Talk to your boyfriend about it," Kylo crossed his arms.

Rey hesitated. "I'm not ready. I just -

"I feel the same way too." There was so much Kylo wanted to say to his brother - for one thing he wanted to give Ben a piece of his mind about the gifts. And how much he hates that he's a temporary replacement for his brother. "Do you want to go out? To help ease our minds?"

"Go out?" Rey raised her eyebrow.

Kylo nodded. "Yeah." They needed time together. A break. He wanted to go out. Been wanting to. He wants to spend time with her outside their comfort zone. He wanted to take her out somewhere nice instead of always taking her to the couch or the living room floor.

"But I thought we agreed to keep us only indoors -

"I'm known to break contracts from time to time."

* * *

Color was escaping him. Rey can tell by the reading the fleeting emotions on his face. He's hesitant, regretful of his decision. She was skeptical with the choice but only went along because he wanted to but now they were still amongst the crowd of animated people.

They're dressed casually – he's in dark jeans and was wearing a washed out charcoal hoodie zipped up with the hood on. They went to his apartment earlier before arriving at the restaurant to allow him to freshen up. He even shaved. His face is bare. It gives him a youthful look – the man in his twenties look opposed to the man pushing thirty. She blinked several times in interest. She rather liked that he was clean shaven, away from any sort of facial hair while she preferred Ben with a full on beard and mustache. It reminded her of his look in his teens, this angst but boyish look.

Rey was wearing a light off the gray sweater and blue jeans.

They match, it occurs to her. They look like a couple instead of friends having dinner. She pretends to go over the menu as she watched Kylo read the options word for word.

"Are you two ready?" the waiter asks.

Kylo looks at her first. Instinctively. She gives him a firm nod. "Yes," he said as he cleared his throat. "We -are."

"Sir," the waiter's voice went into a near whisper. "Your hood."

Kylo stared at the waiter then, stared at him with little patience. "So?"

The waiter hesitated. "The restaurant doesn't allow hats or hoods on. Can you please put your hood down?"

"No."

Rey took a sip of her water. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to go to a five star restaurant if they wanted to blend in. They must of stuck out like a sore thumb in their relaxed attire. She scanned the whole room, no one recognizes them but it was going to happen, she felt. She can feel it in her bones.

"I got into an accident a few years back," Kylo explains as matter of factly. "I'm very insecure about revealing my scars."

"Sir –

"It's okay, we can always go somewhere else," Rey offered. Kylo was causing a scene.

"It's alright." Kylo nonchalantly slips the waiter a hundred.

The waiter hushes up quickly. "So what will you two have?"

Rey pressed her lips together, preventing herself from laughing. "I can't believe how the waiters here are so easily persuaded," she says the second the waiter leaves.

Kylo smirked. "People are funny with money."

"Do you go here often?"

"Like once a year. The food's good but I never get much privacy since people recognize me."

"So what did you do differently this time?" she asked with a smirk.

"I shaved, not wearing my leather jacket, and didn't request a private table. I'm surprised how hiding in plain sight actually works. I even made a reservation under a different name this time too. Don't worry I'll be paying with cash to avoid the whole background check."

"Really a different name? What name did you give them?"

"Matt."

She raised her eyebrow and laughed. "Just Matt?"

"Matt Leradar."

"Le-radar?" she laughed. "At least give a last name that sounds convincing."

"Hey I had to come up with a name on the spot. I used to have a different name to go by but paparazzi cracked the code. I told them it was French."

"Okay, _Matt_."

Once the food came, Rey and Kylo relaxed. A few people eyed them but nothing else. It was most likely because of their attire at a place like this that caught their attention.

The food's good. Rey had gotten miso soup, spicy tuna rolls, and cucumber rolls. Kylo had much of a variety due to his vast palette and assorted sushi spread across his plate. There were different cuts of fish that she did not recognize. She doesn't ask what they were and proceeded to eat. They ate in silence. In dead silence.

It was so awkward that it made her skin crawl. It reminds her of them before, before Ben went to Kenya and how they barely spoke to another.

She hates feeling this feeling – as if he's disinterested and bored of her.

But they weren't supposed to be out together alone, she told herself. And Kylo was very private and avoided public places. He's an introvert out of his environment. He was trying to lay low, not cause attention.

She feels his foot brush against hers underneath the table. She looked up from her plate and stared at him.

He stared at her blankly but his foot brushed up against her again, deliberately this time.

Her heart skipped a beat.

She wondered if he wanted her to take off her flats and feel him up as they proceeded to eat. Ben always liked it when she did that.

He tilted his head up then, gestures her to turn around.

She does so and sees a man walking towards them, a man with fiery red hair.

"Hey," Kylo says, acknowledging his presence.

"Hi," Hux said with a sly smile. "It's nice seeing the two of you bond while Ben is away."

"Do you follow tabloids or his site?" Rey snorted. Honestly this man was too much. He's always here it feels – like he always keeps a check on them.

"A mixture of both," Hux gave her a smile. "I like keeping up with my colleagues and friends."

Rey sat up straighter. The smile was intended to be welcoming but she saw the smile as it was, an act.

"What's wrong Rey? You seem very nervous."

"Keep your voice low," her eyebrows furrowed.

"Very well," he pulls a chair and sat down.

"That's not what she meant," Kylo hissed.

"It's nice that you are keeping your brother's girlfriend company while he's away," Hux stated.

Rey raised her eyebrow. It sounded almost sincere.

"Ben asked me to. He's a good guy," Kylo answered as if he was speaking to the police.

"You guys look nice together. Hell if I didn't know she was your brother's girlfriend, I thought she was yours."

Her skin tightened.

"Should I take that a compliment?"

"It depends on you."

Rey sank her nails into her palm as she watched the conversation between rivals play out. They talked even after the bill was paid. They talked to a point it sounded like two lost long friends finding each other.

"We should work together again, Ren."

Ren? That must have been Kylo's pseudo name he used to use.

Kylo nodded. "We should."

Hux stood up and offered his hand to Rey. Out of spite, she shook it. "I'll see you around."

* * *

"What was that earlier?" she asked as they got into his car.

Kylo didn't say anything.

"Did you two used to be friends?"

When he does respond its minutes later during the drive. They were supposed to go to the movies after lunch but Hux killed the mood and now they were going back to Kylo's apartment. "He was my best friend until we had a falling out. We're friends to some extent but it's not the same."

"The shoot when you guys were teens?"

Kylo shook his head. "It's more than that."

"What happened?"

"There was this girl Ben and I used to like when were teenagers. We fought over her until we decided to share her. She was our first shared girlfriend," Kylo added. "But Hux didn't understand that it was the only solution."

"And that caused you guys to stop being friends?"

"Yeah. He felt that Ben was using me and only came up with the idea so he can have someone be his substitute whenever it was convenient."

Rey blinked. "So you and Ben stopped being friends with Hux over that?"

"Hux was my best friend," Kylo emphasized. "He was never fond of Ben ever since we were kids. He felt Ben was phony and manipulative and that him being nice was an act." Rey frowned. That really means something coming from Hux himself, the sly calculating man. "Don't be sad, Rey it was bound to happen. I tried for years to get them to get along but it didn't work. It's only part of life. How can I be friends with someone that doesn't like my brother?"

She laid back against the passenger seat, allowing them to be silent. She buried herself in her thoughts and began to pick at the idea that maybe – possibly – it was a stretch that Hux was intimidating all three of them wasn't because he felt threatened or wanted to expose their secret. Maybe it was his twisted way in looking after Kylo. "Do you think Hux knows?"

"I'm pretty damn sure he does." Besides Ben, Hux was the second person that knew him well.

Silence.

"When we get to my apartment I think you should call up Ben," Kylo said to her without an expression on his face.

She forced herself to nod as she wondered if Kylo was asking her because he felt it was time for to make amends or to prove something.

* * *

She calls up Ben like she promised.

Kylo sat beside her, listening intently to the conversation.

"I'm sorry," Ben says, pleads.

Kylo can hear perfectly for she has him on speaker.

He sat still, looking at the corner of the room. His ears burned as he heard his girl say, "It's alright."

His jaw twitched. Honestly why is she being so understanding? She should still be upset that Ben was pressuring her.

"I promise I won't get upset anymore – I don't want you to feel unsafe with me."

Kylo scoffed. What a load of crap. "I'm surprised you didn't get a leash," he muttered.

"Is that Kylo? Is he with you right now?"

"Well, yeah," Rey shrugged. It didn't really matter to her.

"You should have told me that he was with you."

"Well it should be a given that I'll be with her," Kylo raised his voice for Ben to hear him one hundred percent.

"You know what I mean," Ben kept his voice low and placid.

Kylo always hated when he did that. Ever since they were kids. Ben was the type of kid that did the 'I'm not touching you thing' to annoy you.

"Sorry, I'll let you know," Rey said then.

"What did you guys do today?" he asks, he sounded cheerful, relieved.

"We went out for lunch –

"You guys went out? As in out?" his voice went tight.

"Yeah," she said laughed. "Whatever out is there?"

"You already know you shouldn't be seen with him alone."

Kylo cracked his knuckles in the background, trying to sedate his temper.

"We were bored and we were careful –

"Rey, that's not the point. You should have run it by with me first. You know –

"Stop," she said firmly. Rey was tired of being passive. "Stop talking to me as if I'm a child."

Pause.

"I'm sorry," Ben's voice went low. "We just made up. I don't want to fight again."

Kylo's jaw twitched.

She shook her head. "I feel like we didn't. It's not resolved. We're still fighting."

"Listen – I have to go but we'll talk more tomorrow, okay? I love you."

"I love you too." She waits until Ben ends the call. She put her phone away and sighed.

"It's hard. He's far away and he's pressed for time," Kylo tells her. "He does want to make things better. He's also under a lot of stress as it is."

"I know that's what gets to me. I feel like that I don't get a say whenever I'm with him." She takes out her phone again and stared at the back of it. She had a polaroid of her and Ben smiling. She took the photo out of the case and flipped it so when she put the case back, the photo appeared blank. "I wish I had a photo of all three of us," she says. "But I now I can't," she says this to acknowledge Kylo. "We don't even have a photo of just each us together."

"We do," he countered.

Rey shook her head. "No we don't," she laughed lightly.

Kylo thought about it for a moment. "Oh shit we don't. Well, let's take a picture." He pulls out his phone then, and held it up in front them awkwardly with shaking hands.

Rey laughed. "I don't know why but something tells me you've never taken a selfie before," she commented as she watched Kylo fumbled with switching the screen to selfie mode.

"I have like…..last year or so," he said weakly as he scowled. He was becoming frustrated at how sensitive the screen was and how it kept switching back to regular mode. "Come on fuck. This fucker won't fucking work!" he said as he violently pressed against the glass screen. It kept switching back and forth to different modes. "Goddamn it open!"

"Here let me," she repressed herself from laughing. She pressed on the screen with ease.

Kylo rolled his eyes and blew his hair away from his face. He still had his hood and put it down and adjusted his hair then. "Easy for you. You have small fingers and I warmed it up for you."

"I'm pretty sure it was dead before you warmed it up for me," she teased.

Kylo couldn't help but to smirk. He liked it when she talked to him. She seemed so submissive whenever she spoke to Ben - hell scratch that, whenever she was with Ben. But when she's talking to him, just him - Kylo - she has fiery spirit within her. A sharp tongue and a cheeky nature. She's insightful with him, she's curious and playful

"Come here, get close to me," she instructed.

He does so, scoots close to her as he held his phone in the air.

"Smile," she says through a posed face.

Kylo does so. He tries to press capture but his fingers are too bulky.

"Here, let me. I'll do everything then."

Click.

They broke from their pose and looked at the photo. Kylo made a face at the picture. In the photo Rey looked natural and happy while Kylo looked disturbed, staring directly at the screen with wide eyes. "I looked disturbed," he frowned.

"You do," she giggled.

"Do I always look like that?"

"Yes."

"Stop teasing," Kylo grumbled. "Come here," he said, pulling her closer. They take the photo again, this time Kylo smiles this time.

Click.

They examine the photo - Rey looks as nice as she did in the first photo while Kylo looked like a maniac with an overbearing wide smile. Like a toothy hyena.

"Let's try again," Rey said. She covered her mouth with her hand from laughing.

Click.

"Ew. Nope," he shook his head automatically.

"I think that's sort of nice."

"No. _You_ look adorable. I look like a psycho killer."

Click.

Click.

Click.

"What the fuck?" he mumbled. "Why is it so hard for me to take a selfie? I model for a living! I was sex symbol of the year three times -

Rey giggled. He always gets mad at anything. "I kind of like the photos -

"You are not keeping those photos," he raised his voice out of frustration. "I'm going to delete them."

"Come here let's try another one." She pressed her face against his and smiled wide in a cheesy manner. "CHUUHHH-EEESSSSE," she said in an overbearing tone as she closed her eyes and jumped about.

Kylo couldn't help but to laugh. "Stop jumping - you're going to smear - you're a fucking kid I swear."

Click.

They examined the photo together.

"I like this one," he says as his blood levels went down. The photo pleased him for he genuinely looked happy and because of her - that he was next to her -this ray of sunshine. "How can you possibly still look cute with making a face like that? It's fucking dark magic I swear."

Rey laughed. "You think I'm cute?" she asked smugly.

"No shit. You're my girlfriend." Kylo brought his phone closer to his face and examined it more, the photo. "You're so fucking photogenic - how? Like how fucking how?" he asked exasperated.

She shrugged.

"I'm going to keep this photo. The other photos can be erased from existence."

Rey nodded. "Fair enough," she said emphasizing the 'f" sound. God he liked her accent. It was her accent that makes her so graceful and poised, he swears. "Kylo," she called out his name.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For this!" She snatched the phone out of his hands and ran.

"Hey!" he laughed as he chased after her.

"I'll give it back to you once I send all the photos to myself!"

"Over my dead body! Come back here!"

"Never!" she declared.

He snatched her by the waist then. "You're such a fucking kid!" he laughed.

"So what if I am? You're not deleting them until I get a copy!" she squealed as he twisted her about.

Rey fumbled about and freed herself and ran for cover.

She ends up in his room - he pushes her on his bed and climbed on top of her. Rey squirmed about underneath his weight. She laughed. "No. You still can't delete them." She raised her hand above her head, moving the phone further away from him. She manages to flip him over and go on top of him. It's brief though for he fought back with vengeance.

"I can do this all day," he grinned.

She laughed as they wrestled with one another. It wasn't a serious thing. No danger. No animosity. Just playing with one another. Laughing. Giggling. They kept fighting for dominance. "So can I. I've been told I'm scrappy, the underdog of every room I enter," she says with pride.

He moved about, kept her pinned underneath him as she wiggled. "You say that as if that's something to be proud of."

"It is," she stuck out her tongue. "I'm a mutt with eighteen years of self defense and you're a pure bred."

"I thought you were a kitten," he taunted. He couldn't help but to be amused by her sense of humor.

"I'm _no_ kitten. I'm an underdog that needs no care."

"Just give me the phone, that's all I want."

"No." She clutched on to the phone and moved it further above her head.

"Fine, I'm going to be even more rough with you," he laughed, pressing his entire weight on her.

She giggled. She's not scared. She's not threatened. She feels so safe with him. This is the type of play she likes. Not the degrading kind, not the dominant and submissive play. "Oh yeah? That's what you're calling earlier?" she bantered. "What are you going to do now?"

He gave her a wicked smile.


	11. Fangirls and Fanclubs

**A/N: so sorry I just realized I accidentally posted the chapter "Fanclubs and Fangirls" first before posting the chapter before. Go back to read the chapter that was supposed to go before; "Contracts"**

* * *

They twisted about. She kept the phone secured in her grip as he tried to stabilize her - tried to pin her. Rey giggled as she tried to kick him off of her. "Stop!" she laughed. She moved about but he kept her static from the weight of his body.

"No," he lamented.

Rey kicked hard, wiggled about. Nothing.

His eyes darkened at the sight underneath him. Flushed body, rosy cheeks, wild hair spilling everywhere as she struggled to escape from him. She looks so aroused in this frenzied state she was, as if she was in heat too. It didn't occur to Kylo then that since Ben's absence, they haven't been sleeping together. He had been so concerned about getting close to her that his craving for her was sedated. Was. For right now he became transfixed and consumed with hunger.

"Get off me!" she squealed, laughing.

He tilted his head in fascination. She didn't seem afraid of him for once. Does not seem intimidated or frightened. He tightened his grip on her, completely losing interest in the object and instead stared at her as she moved about. His mouth is set in a neutral state, neither happy or depressed. His eyes flickered slowly, darkening to the point he only sees her.

"You're heavy! Get off," she smiled, laughing.

That smile, he wanted to have it. He wanted to press his mouth on her lips and save it in memory, as if he was pressing flowers to preserve the moment of life. He can take it, can take that smile but he waits to examines her more.

She thinks he's still playing with her.

He bucked his hips up, pressing himself in between her legs.

He waits for her to react but she doesn't. Instead she laughed.

Kiss her, he told himself. He licked his dried lips at the sight of her smile. He leaned down but paused as she twisted about. Kiss her- why cant you kiss her? He's kissed her before - but it's always with Ben. He'd never kissed her on his own, only when he's instructed or encouraged to. He remembers his reluctance to take her first and how Ben had to arouse them to. Like animals. Ben had to set the mood, keep them in an enclosed space as if he was a zookeeper trying to get two animals to mate.

Her wrapped his legs around her and pressed himself hard against her.

"I don't want the phone," he tells her.

She raised her eyebrow. "What do you want?"

He leaned to kiss her mouth. She moved away but she giggled in response, encouraging him to continue - to capture her. He leaned - she moved away, twisted about. He raised her pinned hands above her head and locked his legs to hold her down. She shook back and forth - he kissed her throat then.

He catches her off guard he knew, for she went silent. But she was pleasantly surprised he knew by how she winced when he moved his lips away.

He kissed her again and then her mouth.

She refuses him - but he keeps kissing her, forcing his entrance into her mouth. He knows that she's only teasing him but he doesn't want her to. He wanted her. He wanted her.

"Stop!" she said as she laughed again.

It puzzles him why she's still laughing - as if she thinks this is all play -and so he kisses her harder- rubbed his cock against her.

"I know you're only doing this because you want the phone!" she laughed, shaking him away from him.

He rejects her actions and kisses her even more, shoving his tongue into her mouth. It exasperates him that she only thinks he's play kissing with her. He runs his tongue along hers and urges her to reciprocate. He releases her hands to yank her - to lift her up for a moment to peel off her shirt and unclasp her bra. He watches as her mood changes. Her body becomes even more flushed. He pushes her back to his bed and kisses her again, pulling away at the rest of her clothes.

"I want you," he growled into her ear. He bent down and leaves a mark on her throat. She winces as he bit into her sensitive flesh and sucked it hard into a pretty shade of violet.

"I didn't think you wanted me that way," she said, still holding on to his phone. Her free hand went to touch the bruise. It stung, pulsated. Her pants and underwear were around her ankles and she laid there still then as she heard him unbuckle his pants. "Kylo -ah -

He sucked on her neck again and then kissed her as if it was his last time to. "Why do you think that? Why do you think I don't want you?"

She shrugged, letting go of the phone. She puts her hands on his face. She stroked his cheek as her other hand ran through his hair. His eyelids become half lidded from her touch as he took his cock out of his pants. "I know it's sort of ridiculous," she blushed, her voice becoming very low. "It's just you never really initiate it."

He kisses her then.

She kisses him back, kicking the rest of her clothes away.

"I don't want to pressure you that's all," he tells her in between kissing her.

"And now?"

"It's been a while."

She nodded, kissing his head as he sucked on her nipples. His tongue is warm as she remembered, it's rough with her nipples, tugging and biting with the same ferocity as her throat. Rey bit her lip. "Kylo - be gentle."

"Sorry," he said, slowing his pace.

He's never gentle. Even when he tries, he's rough with her. He's nuzzling her breasts, rubbing his face frantically as his held her tight while the other hand fingered her for her slick wetness for him to go him. She fidgeted. It felt as if he was ripping through her.

"What's wrong?"

"Be gentle - it's been a while. Kylo - please slower it feels like you're going to suck me dry." She kisses the top of his head.

He moaned from her touch. "I'm sorry - it's hard. I'm trying, honestly I am." He moved to suck on her other nipple but paused at the sight of the teeth marks and bruises he had left. "It's so hard to control myself with you."

"Why is that?" she asked as she pulled his fingers away from her clit. She stroked his throbbing cock, gesturing him to enter.

He eagerly accepts. He twitched as he tried to go in slowly. "I don't know. I've felt this way since our first shoot."

Rey blushed.

Before she could respond he kissed her again. Swarmed her with kisses as he rubbed his tip against her folds. He wanted to shove himself so much but he had to be gentle.

"When I touch you, it does something within me," he bit onto another section of her throat. "I don't know - honestly I don't know." He moaned. Whined as went in slowly. "I just - ugh - I JUST WANT to take you." He bit his lip as he watched her pant as his tip slid into her, "Almost there," his eyebrows furrowed at the sight.

He pushes himself slowly, monitoring her, preventing himself from doing something he'll regret.

"I was afraid you didn't like me as much," she admitted, trying to soften that hard stare he had on her. She held him as he moved, welcoming him to do more to her.

He shook his head immediately. "Why?"

"I don't know - you were barely around."

"It's because you're always with Ben."

"I like you too," she leaves a soft kiss on his jaw as he thrusted into her. She shut her eyes. She had forgotten how thick he was. How warm he was.

He stopped thrusting into her. "Are you hurt?"

"No," she shook her head through pants.

"Then why did you close your eyes?"

"Because it felt so good."

He twitched inside of her.

"Do you want to know something?" she asked as she wrapped her legs around his waist, forcing herself to get closer to him. She moved her body, going back and forth along his length. She gritted her teeth. It felt so good.

"What?"

"Growing up, you were my favorite twin," she blushed, looking away. Growing up, all the girls were on sides on which Solo brother was their favorite. Team Kylo. Team Ben. For some reason, she gravitated towards him. It made her embarrassed just thinking about it.

"Really?" he grinned. He moved with her, easing the pressure that was building. "Did you have T-shirts? Make posters?" he was becoming smug.

"Don't get cocky," she spat out, blushing even harder. "I was like seven. I just thought you were the cuter one." He was the bad twin, the bad boy. He spent his night partying, stealing and crashing cars, getting into fights. For some reason, the kid her found that attractive. This older man - this seventeen year old was doing whatever he wanted. It attracted her.

"You thought? What you don't think I'm cute anymore?"

She smirked. "Nope." You're sexier, she wanted to say. You're more distinguished, she wanted to say but her pride didn't let her.

"I don't believe you." He grinned at her stupidly.

Rey rolled her eyes. "I was a kid. I didn't know better."

"When did you stop thinking I was cute?"

"When I was twelve." She rolled her hips, moving along with him. Talking with him eased the pain. It was feeling nice.

"You're lying," he grinned, following her as well.

"You're so full of yourself."

"Rey."

"Fine," she sighed. "If you want to destroy all the respect you have of me, I used to have posters of you."

"Really?" he couldn't help but to smile and chuckle. He pulled out of her and laid her down. He was on top of her but only put half his weight on her. "Just me?" He should be shaken by their ten year age difference and hearing her childhood crush over him but he's not. He's rather smitten and found it endearing.

"Yeah," Rey covered her face with her hands from the sight of his amusement. "Stop smiling like that. You look creepy." While Kylo was seen as the bad boy twin, Ben was the sweetheart. Kid her for some reason liked teen Kylo, maybe because of the devilish smirks he makes and the way he just didn't care.

Kylo laughed. "You're the one to talk, fangirl."

"Stop," she mumbled, hitting his chest. Her cheeks were hot red.

He caught her wrist and moved it away from her face. "I want to see you," he pleaded in a soft tone.

"No -

He steals a kiss then, calming her down. "Don't be embarrassed. I think it's cute."

"How can I? It feels like it wasn't too long ago." She got over her infatuation when she was like fifteen. Three years ago. "I used to fantasize about you," she admitted. She doesn't know why she told him that but she did.

His eyes darkened. "Really?" He held her hands, preventing her from covering her pretty face from him.

She nodded, moving her gaze to the ceiling. "Yeah," she breathed. "I used to think about you. Especially in my early teens."

Kylo could picture it, her touching herself in the middle of the night at the thought of him. He couldn't help but to be aroused from the thought and somehow found it endearing. He's been so worried of not having her affections but this whole time he's had it. Had it before he knew her. He's happy that there was an age difference for the eighteen year old him wouldn't have treated her right. He would have taken advantage of her as if she was some object but he's not a teenager anymore. He's grown up, learned from his destructive past. "Rey," he whispered.

She looked up at him.

He wants nothing but to be good to her.

He brought her hands down to his neck and kissed her. He takes her again, takes her gently. He's never been this gentle before, never had her like this - to himself. He has all of her, has her in his grasp, takes her in whole. He has her full attention.

"Kylo," she whimpered. He started to quicken his pace. He was so close and she could feel it. Her body had given out a while ago. "Kylo - Kylo - it feels so good."

He had never heard such a sweet sound before. "Rey," he calls out her name. "Rey." Calls out so he can hear her say his name.

"Kylo."

"Rey."

"Kylo."

"I'm all yours, Rey." He means it. Means every single word.

The phone rings then. Her phone. He's able to tell by her ringtone. "Rey, your phone," he tells her as he moaned. She felt so good. He doesn't want to stop thrusting into her.

"Don't stop," she holds on to him. "I'm so close Kylo."

He moaned louder. She wants him to finish her off. He's so close too - so close. "It might be Ben," he tells her.

"It might be someone else," she countered. She kissed his lips as she rolled her hips again. "I don't want to break apart from you right now. Not even for a moment." This was important to her right now. This was their first time alone and she wanted to finish it, without any interruptions.

He holds on to the bed post as he came in to her, watches intently as threw her head onto the pillow as he filled her.

The second he finished, he collapsed on to her out of exhaustion and rests his head on her chest. He wrapped his arms around her and breathed heavily, gathering his breath. He falls asleep in peace from her fingers running through his tousled hair.

For this very moment it felt that she was only his.


	12. Pretty Picture

Pretty Picture

* * *

When morning came, Rey wakes up to the light creeping through the curtains and a man entangled to her. She stared with wide eyes at the sight of him, this wide large sleeping man. He's sweaty from the heat her body was transferring. Rey blinked, sweeping his hair away and then she unfolds herself from him and into the cold. She was still bare from last night, her body ached as she walked step by step.

She stands herself in front of the mirror and examines the traces of last night. She felt sticky still, the inner part of thighs had dried come on her.

Her body was covered in nothing but bruises. Bruises and splotches of red and bite marks were on her breasts, throat, shoulders, thighs, wrists - everywhere. Rey's eyes flickered at the sight. She hadn't been this covered in bruises since she was young, when she refused the advances of one of her foster parents. She retaliated to the beatings with fighting back and running to the police to report him.

She looks as if she had been beaten.

Rey stared with huge eyes and slowly pressed her fingers to her lips. Her bottom lip was swollen from being chewed and tugged. "What am I supposed to do?" she asked as sees Kylo in the mirror. "I have an audition in two days." If she'd known how rough he was, she would never have agreed to last night. She'd forgotten how she bruised easily, how sensitive her skin was. She frowned as it occurred to her that if someone saw her bruises, they would assume she was having an affair while Ben was away.

Kylo stands behind her and carefully wraps his arms around her waist. He rests the side of his cheek on her shoulder. "I'm sorry. We can cover it with makeup."

"Everything? How about if I get sweaty or it gets smeared?"

"We can reapply," he tells her. He presses a feeble kiss on the side of her head.

She faintly chuckled. "It's alright. Don't be sad," she assured him as he kisses her head again.

"I need to learn to control myself."

"Yes, you do," she stroked his face.

"You look beautiful," he tells her as he stared at her in the mirror.

"Me? As of right now?"

He nodded.

"I look like I got beaten up!" she laughed.

Kylo doesn't laugh. Doesn't laugh at all. "Please don't joke around like that."

"I'm sorry."

He kissed her head again, keeping his eyes locked on her in the mirror. "The bruises make you even more beautiful. I didn't know I can love you in so many colors. They're evidence that you've been loved." He nibbled on her ear gently. "Adored." He ran his tongue along her earlobe as she shuddered from the sensation. "Pleasured." He cups her face to bring her close to him. He kisses her then.

She kisses him in response, parts her mouth for him.

"Let's go back to bed."

Rey nodded.

They laid down together. He rolls her to lay on top of him and pulls the blanket over them. He looked at her, looked at her in fascination and want.

Rey immediately buried her face to avoid his gaze. His stare was consuming. Seductive. Alluring.

He lifted her head and his eyes glimmered at her, feigning innocence.

"Stop looking at me like that," she mumbled.

He laughed. "Like what?"

"You're giving me bedroom eyes."

"We're in the bedroom."

"Stop being mouthy," she scrunched her nose.

Kylo laughed again. "I can't help it. I like being mouthy with you." He kisses her on the mouth then.

The sound of pleasure escapes from her.

He breaks the kiss abruptly and touches one of many bruises on her throat. There was so many bruises, they overlapped and met.

Rey winced from the slightest touch. It hurts but it also hurt in the sweetest way. "What do you want?" she asked.

"I want you to give me hickeys. All over my throat."

"Don't you have an audition this week too?" They were both in a lull at this moment and were trying to find jobs.

"I don't care."

"I'll only give you some if you promise not to complain about them."

"I won't," he smirked, stroking the bite marks on her shoulder blade. "Come on. Come hither. Mark me up," he said as he tilted his head back. He shut his eyes and smiled smugly.

She let out an exasperated sigh and laughed. "Shut up."

"Hey I, your idol, gave you the best night of your life," he chuckled, smirking as he kept his eyes shut. "The least you can do is give me something to remember by too."

"Thank you I'm forever your loyal follower," she said sarcastically.

"Do you want to make this a routine instead of a one time thing?" he opened one eye then.

They both chuckled like giddy idiots.

She immediately closed that eye. "You're better with your eyes closed," she said cheekily.

He pouts then, pulling another smile form her.

"And yes," she goes along with his humor.

"Give me some love bites." His hands snaked to her waist.

"Fine," she feigns fondness. Rey leaned down and peppered soft kisses along his throat, along his Adam's apple.

"That feels so good," he mewled, twisting about. "Rey please lick me."

She does so, licking all over his neck.

"More." He ran his hands up and down her waist. "More. Use more tongue - there - suck there."

"There?" she asked as she sucked underneath his jawline.

He nodded as she kissed and sucked along his sensitive spot. "Bite there. I want you to bite there."

Rey does so or tries to. She's finds out that his skin is much thicker than hers, sturdier. She bites though, bites down. He writhes underneath her some more, traveling his hands all about her back.

"Fuck - harder Rey. Bite harder."

She does so but carefully. She doesn't want to hurt him.

"Rey - harder please."

Rey hesitated.

"Harder. Bite harder so you'll make a bruise. Don't worry you won't hurt me."

She bites him then, bites it into she breaks into his flesh. She feels him tremble as he moaned. He sank his nails into her back. "Fuck this feels so - ah good. Fuck - fuck." She sucked on the mark furiously as she rotated to licking the bruise. "That's it - fuck."

Her heart was racing as she felt him grip her tighter and tighter.

"I want another mark."

"Where?" she asked.

"I want you to find it yourself. I'll let you know where."

She nodded and pressed her lips against his skin and began to leave little kisses.

While she was in process of giving him a third bruise, he went on top of her, unable to control himself. He stared at her again for a long second and then smashed his lips against hers. "I love you," he rasped, taking her in as if he needed to her to breathe.

Blood rushed to her face. He'd never said that before. But she felt it for a while, felt it on the tip of his tongue that day he gave her a gift. "I love you too -

He kisses her harder, giving her little space to breathe.

She grabbed his hand and squeezed it. He did the same, squeezing her harder.

"I might bruise you more," he warns, reaching to kiss her throat.

Her heart skipped a beat. Aching for him. "I don't mind."

* * *

Kylo makes breakfast while she showered and got dressed. She was wearing one of things her boyfriends had got her, a long sleeved black shirt and a denim blue skirt. The only bruises that were visible were on her throat but she didn't mind.

"Did you take your birth control pill?" he asked her as he put cheddar omelets on their plates. Rey had been on it since she was sixteen years old to protect herself just in case after years of fighting off unwanted advances.

She nodded. "You could have at least put on a shirt." Her eyes focused on the three hickeys scattered around his neck.

"I have pants. That's more than enough."

She touched one of the bruises she had left on his neck and then kissed it.

They sat down and ate together. As they ate, they went on their phones to see their missed notifications.

"Oh Carrie was the one that called me last night," she says, reading the texts that her manager left.

Kylo couldn't help but to sigh. He was relieved it wasn't Ben. Another fight was the last thing they needed. "What she say?" he asked.

Rey bit her lip. "She's wondering why I was spotted with you and Hux." She clicked on the link that Carrie sent her. The link was an article about the photo that someone had snapped of them, speculating if they were discussing on being a part of Hux's upcoming project. "At least the rumor isn't scandalous," she exhaled.

"Well what are you going to tell her?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. What do you think I should say?"

Kylo thought about it and shrugged. "Shit. I don't know. Maybe just let her believe in the rumor." The rumor was tamed, actually reasonable this time.

"She's going to ask questions." Carrie was already wary that Rey was dating Ben. If Carrie knew the full truth, she would have a heart attack. "She is my manager after all."

He frowned. "What'd she say?"

"She said if it was true that I have to agree to the project."

Kylo laughed. "Well how about you just think about it for a while before giving an answer?"

Rey nodded. "You're right." She put her phone down and took a bite of her food. She lets herself relax before tensing up. "I should probably text Ben." She felt guilty for she and Kylo were bonding while Ben was lonely.

Kylo's face fell. He forced himself to nod. "You should."

He watches her as she texted. He doesn't look at his phone, he stares at her directly.

His phone vibrated - she sent a message through the group text.

"What did you say?" he asked. He doesn't want to read the message.

"I just told him that I want us to make things better. That I want to video chat with him tonight."

Both their phones vibrated then.

Her smile tells him that Ben said yes.

* * *

Kylo tries to brush it aside. He doesn't want to let it get to him the whole day. But it's on the back of his mind even when they're on the couch. He rests his head on her lap, watching her concentration as she fixed his old Walkman. She is very diligent even as she breaks the whole thing apart.

"If you drop that thing on my face, I'm going to sue," he tells her.

Rey laughed. "I thought you like getting bruises."

"From you, not from hunks of plastic." His eyes locked on to the bruises on her throat then. He likes the colors that he gave her. He brushes his fingertips against one that was on her collarbone. "Does it still hurt?"

"Not as much."

"I'll get you some ice."

He leaves her for a moment and comes back with a pack of ice. Instead of laying back on her lap, he sat right beside her and placed the ice on her throat. "Better?"

"Yes. Much better. Thank you."

He steals a kiss, pecks her on the cheek and then nuzzled her neck.

"Stop!" she laughed, wincing from the stubble. "I'm trying to fix this -

He gave her a sloppy kiss and then another, keeping the ice on her neck. Something came over him - this feeling of desperation and need. Soon Ben will come back. And things will go back to normal. He'll be cast aside again while Rey will go back to being Ben's girl.

"Kylo! Stop," she laughed again, shaking her head as she tried to reach for the screwdriver.

He didn't. He kept kissing her, peppering kisses all about.

She pushed him away, holding his wrists from pouncing on her. "What's gotten into you?" she breathed.

"I'm in the mood," he tells her trying to get close to her.

"You can't possibly be," she laughed. "We just had sex in the morning -

Kylo kissed her again.

"Get off of me, you lug. I want to fix your Walkman." She fought him off, pushing as he climbed on top of her.

* * *

He watches as she gets ready for their video chat night, watches with agitation as she pretties herself for Ben. She puts on a nice casual dress and has peachy blush and shimmer all over and coated her lashes. He hates seeing her like this, with the intention to please Ben. He knows that she's trying to ease the tension and all but why does she have to put herself on display? Kylo doesn't say anything though but instead helps. He helps her cover up her bruises and helps curl her long hair.

"You're very good with this - the whole hair and makeup thing," she says in amazement as she stared at him in the mirror. She was fascinated in his concentration as he unraveled a curl.

"My mom has long hair," he explained, shrugging. And then a pause. And then he started to talk more about his mom. Like how she always smelled of ripe pears and vanilla. Or how much she liked pork chops and applesauce. And how much she loved her generation. And how rebellious she was in her youth.

Rey couldn't help but to smile. She likes how Kylo speaks so fondly of his mom. He's a momma's boy, she knows even though he'll never admit it. Ben doesn't have a preference in his parents but Kylo does. Even though Kylo keeps saying that he doesn't have a favorite parent, she saw right through him. Whenever his mom calls, he picks up immediately. Whenever she tells him she misses him, he goes to her in an instant.

Ben even revealed to Rey about their first day of Kindergarten and how their mom had to pick them up early because Kylo kept crying for her. It wasn't like Ben was detached to his parents or anything but he's always been an independent soul, an old soul. As a kid, it was easy for him to transition to sleeping in his own room while it took Kylo a bit longer for he was used to sleeping in between his parents.

"I want to meet her. She sounds nice."

A pause.

She looks up.

"When the time is right," he tells her firmly.

Rey nodded.

* * *

Kylo dreads the night. He counts every little second, from the space between her fingertips to the pressing the screen. He watches her pull up Skype and stares blankly at the signal.

Within seconds, Ben answers.

"Hey," Ben greets them but his eyes are locked on to Rey.

"Hey," she beams.

"Hi," Kylo mumbled.

Ben keeps his eyes on her and stares at her the way a wolf does before devouring his prey. "You look beautiful," he complimented.

Kylo's jaw twitched as he involuntary cracked his knuckles.

Ben notices his brother's irritation. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing. We just miss you. The distance is a bitch," Kylo explained. It's not a complete lie because the truth is, he does miss Ben. Always. Even when they were little kids fighting for the same toy and gave each other silent treatment. The silent treatment never lasted long for Kylo would end up giving up and beg for forgiveness. No matter what, no matter what little argument they have, they always made up. That's something they both got from their parents.

Ben's face softens. "It's alright. I'll be back at the end of the week."

Kylo couldn't help but to wince. His ears burned from the words - burned at how soon it was.

He sits there as Rey and Ben engaged into a deep conversation. He's quiet again, feels inadequate. There's no space for him, it's a conversation meant for only two. He knows he shouldn't feel this way - full of jealousy and resentment towards his brother. Rey was their girl, of course he had to share. It's not like he's never shared before. He and his brother shared everything, hell the same womb. They shared interests, toys, clothes, girlfriends before. But this - this was different.

Kylo clears his throat and tries to interrupt - to acknowledge the two that he's not completely satisfied with the arrangement -

"Kylo walked first," Ben told her with a chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Rey asked.

"He was so insistent to get me to walk. Mom said that he kept pulling me off the ground to get me to learn," he laughed. There's fondness in Ben's tone. Love.

The emotions have Kylo's stomach twist. He closes his mouth then.

Rey laughed. "That's sweet," she said to Ben as she squeezed his hand.

He squeezed back and gave her a small smile.

"Who spoke first?" Rey asked as Kylo rested his head on her shoulder.

"Pet his hair," Ben tells her.

She does so and it eases him and reminds him that his brother does care.

"I spoke first."

"Really?" she asked teasingly, staring down at her boyfriend who was with her in the same room. "I thought Kylo would since he is very vocal and loves throwing tantrums."

His eyes flickered up, feigning innocence.

"What was your first word Benny?" she said as she kept petting Kylo's hair.

"Chewy," Ben laughed. "I miss that dog. But me and him were always speaking to each other, even without a language. There's home movies of us just babbling in our highchairs and laughing."

"I want to see," Rey cooed. She could pictured the pretty picture, two little baby boys with large dark eyes and long lashes and thick hair. It was no surprise that they were models since the beginning.

"You should, we were pretty adorable."

Kylo scoffed. "Were?"

Ben rolled his eyes and smiled. "Well you're still adorable."

He nodded in pride. "Damn straight."

"Kylo's first word was Mommy. Dad says that Kylo didn't know the difference between a mom and dad and also called him mommy. It took a while for Kylo to learn how to say Daddy but my theory is that he was just punking dad."

Kylo keeps quiet, being comforted and pampered by her soft fingers. He didn't want to speak for he likes when Ben speaks fondly of him.

"I remember one time when we were six, I broke my arm from falling off my bike," Ben shook his head, pressing his lips together to keep himself composed. "Dad tried teaching us how to ride a bike. I had to miss Uncle Luke's sparring sessions because of it. During that time, Uncle Luke was rarely around because of work and so missing quality time was the worst thing to happen to us."

"Well yeah, he was our second dad," Kylo added. "I remember that day, he spent the whole day with us and was just going to leave you with mom for two hours for the sparring session and come back for you again."

"Kylo felt so bad that I was going to miss it and he didn't want go without me so guess what he did Rey."

Rey raised her eyebrow. "He stayed behind to watch movies with you and play with you?"

Ben laughed and then shook his head at Kylo. "I wish he did. Instead he broke his arm on purpose."

"Kylo!" Rey shifted back.

"Hey! I was a kid! My thought process wasn't as developed!" Kylo defended himself.

"What else did you do?" Rey asked. "What knocked out your own teeth whenever Ben lost one?"

Kylo couldn't help but to blush.

"He would even get himself sick on purpose too to avoid going to school alone," Ben added. "Whenever I was sick, he would immediately drink from my cup and wipe his nose with my used up tissues."

"Kylo!" Rey breathed.

"It's not his fault Rey, our whole lives we were constantly monitored to look alike and always be together. We were always together, had to be together."

"I know - just hearing that story makes me question about ever having kids."

They stared at her in silence.

"I'm kidding," Rey clarified. "But I'm worried I might be having little devils."

"I admit we were handfuls -

Kylo snickered. "Benny do you remember when we were seven and got into a fight over who would be leader in our monster game?"

Ben shook his head in fondness. "It's impossible to forget."

"What happened?" Rey asked.

"I socked Ben in the face out of anger. I felt really bad the second I did that I let him sock me too. We both had black eyes for a week."

"I swear to you Rey, our love for each other is healthy," Ben promises.

* * *

Before they know it, Ben's back.

They hug him like crazy. "I missed you so much," Rey said as she squeezed him again.

Ben warily smiled. "I missed you guys too," he presses a kiss on her cheek.

She goes on her toes to fix his unruly hair. It was a long flight and his hair and clothes and glasses were disheveled. "We made you your favorite meal," she tells him, kissing him again.

He yawned. "Thank you but I'm not really hungry."

"It's okay. We get it. Just sleep and the food will be still there waiting for you," Kylo laughed. He examined his brother, his brother looked so worn out. So tired. He lost weight too, Kylo could tell by the way his clothes pooled around him.

"I'll do that after I spend some quality time with Rey."

Kylo winced. He forced himself to nod though. "Don't worry - I'll um, keep myself busy."

Rey sensed something was off with Kylo. "Are you okay Kylo -

"This place is a mess," Ben said as he eyed around the room. "I've been gone for only a few months and you guys let this place go."

"We've been busy," Rey said. "Also it's not that mess-

"You've gained weight," Ben said calmly as he examined her head to toe.

Rey's cheeks became a blotchy red. "What?" she asked. It didn't occur to her that eating junk food and take out since Ben's gone would affect her body. She didn't notice until Ben pointed it out and by the look on Kylo, he didn't notice either. She only gained a couple of pounds or so, it was very subtle that the two of them didn't notice.

"You've gained weight since I've been gone. It's not a big deal. You looked like you gained like eight to ten pounds at most. Kylo did too."

"Do you mind it?" she asked. Suddenly she felt very, very self conscious.

Ben shook his head. "No. I'm not trying to hurt you or anything but I'm just letting you know, Rey. After all, you're a model. You have to keep monitoring your weight at all times. Extra pounds will affect if you get jobs and offers. It's not like you gained a lot of weight or anything but your collarbone isn't as prominent and your jaw is a bit soft," he said as he fixed his gaze.

"It's not a big deal," Kylo tries to assure her but his voice is set in the back again. He keeps talking still because that's his girl. "Besides I can't tell that you did. You're still skinny." And she was. Kylo doesn't know how Ben can spot the difference with a couple pounds on her.

"It's nothing to be sensitive about. I'll help you watch your weight and monitor your calories. I'll even help you with exercising," Ben gave her a smile. He reached to touch her face but she took a step back. "Rey, what's wrong?"

Rey shook her head. "It's nothing - it's just I don't feel comfortable having sex tonight."

Ben frowned. "I wasn't trying to offend you earlier -

"I get it," she immediately said. "I know you're trying to help and I understand. It's just I'm not exactly feeling comfortable in my body right now." All her life she never watched what she ate. She never worried about her body image or weight because food wasn't as accessible. It's foolish to not be aware that now she could gain weight and she did. And the way her boyfriend looked at her in disappointment and pointing it out made her feel very insecure.

"Rey I don't care that you gained some weight," Ben said gently. "You're still beautiful. I'm just saying for your career. I'm only trying to help." He wrapped his arms around her and gave her kiss on the head. He bent down to kiss her lips but she dodges him.

"I'm sorry - I don't want to be touched right now," she broke away from his hold. Maybe she's being paranoid but it felt like when he was holding her he was measuring her waist and seeing how loose her skin was and if she had any rolls.

"Rey, baby come here -

"Ben. I think she wants to be alone in her room," Kylo grabbed his brother from going after her.

* * *

Rey stays in her room the whole day. She doesn't even come out to eat. This worries Kylo.

"What are you doing?" Ben asked.

"I'm making her a plate. She has to eat sometime."

"Yes but not those foods. Those foods are too oily and fattening."

"I don't fucking care. I don't feel like making something else," he spat out. "Rey and I spent the whole day cooking this."

"It's alright. I can make something for her right now."

"That's not the point. I don't want her to feel scared about eating food. So what if she and I gained some weight? Our bodies are always going to fluctuate between weights. We can always lose it. It's just me and her haven't bene exercising as much as we should. The way you're talking about picking out her meals is not the way to go. You're going to give her an eating disorder."

"I'm not trying to do any of that."

"Sounds like you are."

Ben ignored his brother's snide little remark. "Let me get her. I want us to eat together."

To Kylo's surprise, Ben manages to get Rey out to eat. They're all sitting together talking and laughing but the mood changes when Ben sees her getting up to make herself another plate.

"I think you had enough for this meal," Ben said calmly.

"Shut the hell up," Kylo snapped. "Let her eat as much as she wants to. She's perfectly fine the way she is."

"I'm trying to help her. This is how it starts. If I don't help her right now she's going to struggle with her weight. She's at a crucial age as it is when her metabolism changes."

"It's okay," Rey said quietly. "I'm not hungry anymore."


	13. Behind the Scenes

Kylo is woken up by the sound of his phone. It's the middle of the night but he answers it half asleep. "Hur-ello?" he yawned.

"Hi I'm sorry for waking you up," her voice is low. Rey.

Her voice wakes him up. "It's alright. Is there anything wrong?"

"No, well I - I want you."

He sat up immediately. She's never wanted him before. "When?"

"Now," she whispered. "If that's okay."

"No - it's plenty okay." He immediately went to her room. He doesn't bother to put on pants or a shirt, she was just next door to him but the second he came in he froze. She was in her bed, staring at him with large eyes. Her hair is down and flowing. She was wearing a blue cami and cotton shorts. Her sensitive nipples were poking through the thin fabric - the sight made his mouth go dry. "You're beautiful," he murmured, closing the door.

She shook her head. She's blushing but it's not because it's true. She's embarrassed.

"No, you are," he tells her. He stood there, keeping his gaze on her. He waits for her, waits for her to say something. But she doesn't. "What do you want?" he asked her. "Because I'm here for you."

"I want to please you."

"What?"

"I want to give you pleasure," she repeated. "I realized I pleasure Ben more than you. I want to pleasure you -

"Rey you don't have to -

"I love you Kylo."

Blood rushed to his face. Was...was that the first time she said that? Because he can't remember the last time she did. "I love you too."

"I'll do anything," she tells him, a small smile curing along her lips.

"Anything?"

She nodded.

"I want you to play with yourself," his voice went hoarse. "I want to watch from here. I want to admire you."

She nodded.

"I want you to wear nothing but my leather jacket," he tells her as he took off his boxers. He's usually insecure about showing a girl his dick when it's limp and small. But he doesn't care right now. "I want you to see how hard you make me."

He stood there watching her peel off the layers of clothing. She went to her closet and puts the jacket on. The jacket covers her, drapes her as if it's a dress.

"Keep your eyes on me," he instructed. God she looks good - he already wanted to jerk off but restrains himself.

She does so, keeping her eyes focused on him as she sat back on the bed. "Show me how to touch myself," she said shyly.

He bit his lip, suppressing a groan. "Lay down. Good - now part your legs a bit. With your hand I want you to use just one finger and run it along the whole length of clit."

"Like this?"

He nodded. Fuck. Fuck. "I want you to be very gentle for yourself. You're pussy is going to be pounded soon."

Rey stared at him, stared at his broad shoulders - his twitching jaw - and the way his hands were trembling. His dick was slowly becoming hard, slowly unraveling before her.

"Rey, keep touching yourself. No distractions," he tells her. "Two fingers now, go about in circles."

She fidgeted.

"Does that feel good?"

"Yes, it feels so good."

"Good, touch yourself more, sink your fingers deep into yourself - are you getting wet?" he asked, biting his lip as he felt the blood rushing down to his cock. He was getting hard by the second.

"Yes. You looked pained, you should touch yourself too."

He looked down and shook his head. "I'm not big enough yet. I don't deserve to relieve myself until I'm big enough for you. Touch yourself faster."

She does so, keeping her gaze on him. She bit her lip as her free hand went to grope her breast. The leather felt good underneath her hand and the sound of his shortened breaths made the whole thing better.

"Baby, now stop touching yourself for a bit and I want you to rub your thighs together. I want you to feel how wet you are." He curled his fingers into tight fists at the sight of her sweet juices running along her thighs and sheets. Her face was getting red, flushed as his dick. "Fuck, you're so beautiful. Touch yourself Rey, touch your breasts. I bet they're swollen and need to be sucked."

He stared at his dick then, it's hard and standing up on its own and trembling. Its deep red and the veins were popping out. Kylo used all his strength to not let his legs buckle and for him to relieve himself. He wanted this tension too, he wanted to show her how aroused she made him - how much he was attracted to her. "I want you to get the dildo that's in the nightstand. You're too tight for me. I need you to loosen your tight cunt."

Beads of precum was trickling out of his head and down his length and splattering to the floor.

"You're wet," she tells him as she started to rub the tip of the dildo along her slick.

His jaw twitched again as his mouth watered at how much was spilling out of her. Her sweet juices were drenching the sheets and going to waste. He moaned. "I don't care. I want to suffer a bit longer. It'll make it even better when we do have sex."

"This thing is not as big as you though," she said as she slowly put it in inch by inch.

His hands trembled and involuntarily went to his dick. He stopped himself, letting his dick release more weakened liquids. "Close your eyes," he instructed her. "And imagine me."

She does so, shuts her eyes and puts the entire thing into her pussy and slowly moved it in and out. "It doesn't feel the same," she whined. "I want you in me. Please."

Fuck. "Take it out then," he tells her as he slowly made his way towards the bed.

"Do you want me to get in any position?"

He shook his head. "No. I just lay down like that. I want to see your face."

He went on top of her and pinned her by her wrists with one hand. He rubbed his tip against her wetness and he held the dildo in his hand. He put it into his mouth and sucked it clean. "You taste so good," he said.

"You can taste more if you want," she tells him.

He grinned wickedly. He sank the dildo back into her wet pussy whole and then pulled it out to suck her dripping juices.

"Not like that," she chuckled. "I want your mouth on me."

"Why?" he asked keeping his eyes on her as he sunk the thing into her again.

She whimpered.

"It'll feel better," she tells him. She slipped from his grip and linked her arms around his neck. She kissed him then.

He moved away. "No I -

"I don't care," she said. "I don't care if I taste myself. I want to kiss you."

Kylo moved away. "You deserve better," he said as he kissed her neck. He fingered her then before putting his mouth on her. She came so easily. With every stroke she became wetter and wetter by the second. He licked first and then sunk his face into her, rubbing his nose against her wetness. He sucked on her sensitive bud and lapped her all around. "I love you so much," he murmured.

"I love you too."

He crawled on top of her and nuzzled her cheek.

* * *

When morning came, Ben went to her. To his dismay, he finds them asleep together, with her head on his brother's chest. Ben winced as if he had been slapped. He tried talking to her last night but she refused to let him in - but she allowed Kylo in? Why? Ben frowned. He sat down on the chair and decides to wait for them to wake up. This - this wasn't good. Things have changed since he had went away. Changed during and now, after. Rey's been different - been distant with him. She's been acting up, and starting to favor his brother.

"Morning," he greets them, killing any chance of them sharing another precious moment. He keeps his tone even, keeps his smile perfectly relaxed.

The two immediately sat up. Kylo covered her in the blanket. "Hey," Kylo said in confusion. "How - how long have you've been here?"

"An hour," Ben shrugged. "How are you feeling, Kitten?" he asked her.

"I'm feeling better," she said slowly, hesitating.

Ben frowned. She looked scared. "I'm sorry for last night. I didn't meant to offend you, Kitten."

"It's alright, I overreacted."

Kylo frowned. "No, Rey you didn't. Ben should have been more sensitive."

"I should," he admitted. He went up to her and pressed a kiss on her temple. He waits for her to kiss him but she doesn't. Instead she remained still. Ben's skin tightened. "Kitten what's wrong?"

"Nothing - it's just I don't really want to kiss right now."

"I see. You're okay being intimate with Kylo but not with me?"

"I didn't say that -

"You don't have to. Rey, don't you like me anymore?"

Rey hesitated. "I do - it's just we just fought last night -

"And we haven't seen each other in months. I'm hurt, Rey. I missed you so much and yet you refused me and slept with Kylo instead."

"Kylo's my boyfriend too," she said.

"Yes but you've been sleeping with him since I've been gone. I didn't mind but expected things to return back to normal when I came back. Rey, I love you. I barely slept last night. I wanted your company, craved it." Ben reached to touch her hair.

She frowned. "I'm sorry, Ben."

"It's okay, Kitten," he kisses her again. He reaches for his pocket and pulls out a ribbon choker to put on her pretty neck.

"Don't do that," Kylo growled, slapping his hand from her.

Ben raised his eyebrow.

"She doesn't like that," Kylo muttered.

"It's a gift. I got it for her -

"No, it's not a gift. She doesn't like wearing them."

"Nonsense. Rey tell Kylo that you like wearing them," Ben told her.

She blushed. "Well I don't mind wearing them - but I don't exactly like them either."

"It's alright," he assured her. He sat down and kissed her temple again.

She kissed him then but it felt forced.

Ben moved away and blinked. "Kitten, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing - I'm just sore from last night."


End file.
